Bretrayed...how to move on
Find a Conversation
Bretrayed...how to move on
| Mon, 06-14-2004 - 9:58am |
I have recently found out that my best friend & my lover had a "kissing session" while he drove her back home....It had been a great fun night out for all of us. The next day I had a very strong feeling that something had gone on....Though we have been friends for more then 15 years, she is in a long term relationship, we have gone through rainy days & good days together...I have always trusted her. ( The lover holds 50% responsibility...and he is out of my life )
To some, this is just a kiss... she says "she is very sorry...It did not mean anything...She is not even atracted to him"...I still feel deeply hurt and betrayed. In my mind we have passed the stage in our lives where we should know better ( we are both in our 30's ) And I feel it was a very selfish act, looking for instant gratification on her part...
I know our friendship will survive this - ( not the lover... )I expected more from her because of our history together and our strong bond!
MY QUESTION is how do you move on? HOW do you get passed this...Right now I told her I need a break from our friendship - At the same time I feel like we are teenagers all over again over a boy & a kiss!!!
Let me know your thoughts...

This situation sucks whichever way you look at it. I'm sorry this happened to you. here is my two cents...
I think that your friend is no friend at all. If she would do that to you, the friendship is not really worth saving. What makes me so angry about the whole situation is what she said, "it meant nothing. I'm not even attracted to him." Is that supposed to make you feel better!?!? Basically, what she's saying is: she hurt you so badly for NOTHING. She didn't even CARE about this guy; but the thought that you might be hurt didn't even faze her in the moment. It sucks badly enough when a friend falls in love with your SO and betrays you; but at least it's understandable if they want them so badly.
This girl obviously only cares about herself. I'd say to her "so, this NOTHING kiss with my boyfriend meant more to you than not hurting me. I guess this is goodbye."
Well, there you have it. Sorry, I know it's a strong opinion and very easy for me to type because I'm not the one faced with the decision of carrying it out. Please tell us what you decide. I wish you the best of luck!
-Sugar
I am waiting for my lover to get back from Europe to let him know my thoughts...And like someone was telling me - Giving up 15 years of friendship over this womanizer, it will give him power over this situation...
...THANKS!
I think too often we cut our women friends too much slack. We accept behavior from them that we would dump any guy for. Why? Why take dirt from your girlfriends, if you wouldn't take it from the men in your life? Trust me, women can hurt you just as bad as any man out there can.