To call or not to call? HELP!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2003
To call or not to call? HELP!!
3
Sun, 01-08-2006 - 12:27pm

In a nutshell, there was somebody I was interested in (he also showed signs that he was also interested) a while back (almost 6 months) at the gym where I work out. I have not seen him for that period as he had left the gym (I did not know he was going to leave), so I thought that was that. The very last time I saw him I was leaving the gym and he was ahead of me on the escalator, he kept on looking back at me when I was going down. Then he stopped for a while at the bottom until I was almost down, and then he suddenly walked off. I got the impression that he wanted to approach but then chickened out.

Recently, I happen to find out his phone no. from a friend who worked out with him briefly for a few sessions (he's a trainer).

Should I call him, and what should I say? I could pretend to be interested in a training session and ask where he works now? The only thing I'm scared of is that if he doesn't train anymore then it'll be hard to find out where he works unless I come completely clean and tell him who I am (dunno if he remembers me, though I think he does. We have never spoken, just played a lot of eye tennis). I was thinking in that case, I would just ask him straight out.

But I just wanna know, is this *really* weird?? What would you do if you were me? We were pratically strangers before, and it has been a while.

Does anyone have any ideas for me on what to say etc. Somehow I feel that I only have one shot at this and if I don't get it right then I'd look like a stalker if I have to call him again and change my story...Guys, would you get freaked out if some stranger from like half a year ago calls suddenly to ask you out? Aarrghh! I need to know what the best form of action is.

Thnx in advance for any ideas!! :D

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Sun, 01-08-2006 - 4:17pm

You have his phone number. You have nothing to lose in placing a call to this guy. I would not lie to him. I'd almost recommend leaving him a clear and concise message if you can rather than talking to him directly and see whether he calls you back.

Explain who you are, why you are calling. He may not remember you, he may have a girlfriend. You must prepare yourself for rejection. However, tell him that you are sorry he left your gym, you are interested in getting to know him better and you would like to get together for coffee.

You have an really small outside chance, 1 in 1000 of this working but you don't lose anything by taking a chance. Go ahead and do it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2003
Mon, 01-09-2006 - 10:02am
Hi, thnx for your advice. You're right, I have nothing to lose. I was just curious about why you said I have a very small chance? Thnx!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Mon, 01-09-2006 - 12:58pm

You have a small chance because he probably won't remember who you are, might have a girlfriend, might feel creeped-out that some strange woman has got ahold of his phone number, or might have a complex about a woman asking him out.

But I am not trying to dissuade you. You like this guy, so go for it. Just prepare yourself for rejection. I've actually done what you have done with exceptional success.