Confused...
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| Fri, 12-08-2006 - 8:56pm |
I met this guy 4 weeks ago. We clicked and he admitted he's the male version of me.
We had an intense 4 days, where he stayed at mine, and we got very close in that time. He then went home and asked me to visit him the following day at his. I stayed over for 2 nights. The first morning I was in his bed waiting for him to finish work. When he got back he admitted it was cool although weird that I was waiting for him to get back...maybe it scared him a bit?
Ever since that day things have gone bad. He's admitted that things are moving too fast for him, and "maybe we should cool off for a bit" and "I need a little space"
I know he broke up with his girlfriend of 7 years, about 4 months ago, so it could be he's not ready for anything. Still, we clicked and he was even talking about us going on holiday together..so there must be something there.
I know he felt what I felt. I could see it in his eyes.
Currently not making any contact with him, as I'm giving him the space he wants. I suggested a few days ago that we be friends if it's easier for him. He's taking space, so maybe deciding on that??
What's going on in his head? I'm trying to move on, but the situation with him feels right, and he even admitted it...but is he ignoring his true feelings? Scared to fall for anyone other than his ex?
I've not had sex with him yet, as I wouldn't unless I'm in a relationship with the person.
Mia

What is going on in his head is exactly what he said, the two of you are moving too fast. Give him all the space he needs.
Dating takes time, too much togetherness too fast is too much. Please concentrate on your own life, friends, hobbies. Relationships are not the be all and end all.
miaa2006...
Pianoguy doesn't want to put a label on any woman reading this, but there are clearly 2 types! .
Woman Type #1:
A woman dates a man for a few weeks or months, but still expects the "we're still in a new relationship" courtship process to continue indefinitely. This means...that the only times she'll "hang out at his house or apartment" will be when she's invited! Staying the night, the weekend, or longer than a few hours is OUT!
Woman Type #2:
A woman has become 'comfortable' dating a man for a few weeks or months, and has no reservations about "hanging out at his place" when he's at work or away! She might get the invitation to "COME IN ANYTIME--WHETHER I'M HERE OR NOT---HERE'S MY KEY!"
Most men don't think about issue number one...but issue #2 often gives many of us 2nd thoughts. It's not that we don't want to find you waiting for us when we walk through the door! It's more along the lines of "we've had a crappy day at work or we were cut off on the way home by a stupid driver"---so "thank goodness I've got my privacy!!!!
Contrary to what a few of our ivillage ladies might believe....AS MUCH AS YOUR MAN MAY LOVE YOU...THERE ARE DEFINITELY TIMES WHEN WE DON'T WANT THE OBLIGATION TO ENTERTAIN OR EVEN TALK TO YOU! Quiet time and personal space can be VERY IMPORTANT to practically ALL OF US!
Hope this helps? At least a little?
Pianoguy