Confused

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2006
Confused
3
Thu, 05-18-2006 - 9:59pm
A couple weeks ago I met this guy when I was out of town. He is actually a friend of a friend. He asked me for my number, and by the time I got home he called. Since then we've had great phone conversations. He offered to come to my city so that we could go out and invited me back to his. He also let me know that he was interested in dating me, and I responded positively to that. Before we ended the our last phone call, he went on and on about us keeping in contact with each other. He acted as though he didn't want to lose contact with me. I knew that wouldn't be a problem for me because I really liked him. After that I decided that I would attempt to initiate contact more than I had been. Well, it's been over a week since I've talked to him, and I've attempted to call a couple times with no answer. I know he has a very demanding job and a very busy schedule, but I, personally, feel that he could've returned my calls by now. I would like to talk to him, but I've decided not to call again. I just don't understand why he would act so interested, then "disappear". Any thoughts?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
In reply to: summer_1206
Thu, 05-18-2006 - 10:44pm

He said those things because at that moment in time he really wanted to maintain the relationship. However, once he was off the phone, his job, his friends, his life and anything else going on probably took up his time.

He might be really really busy, or he might just want to have a great conversation with a wonderful woman and then move on to the next thing in his life.

If he doesn't call back with a really good explanation for his absence, move on.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2006
In reply to: summer_1206
Fri, 05-19-2006 - 9:03am
if you have called him a couple times the past week, i would leave it at that. he is obviously to busy and not really considerate of you. If someone uses the excuse that they were too busy to call you (for a week)that just means they don't want to. forget him. anybody can make time within 2 days to make a quick call especially since everyone has cell phones now.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2003
In reply to: summer_1206
Fri, 05-19-2006 - 10:17am
Agh... I'm sorry you're put in this situation. I know it sucks. But please just leave things at that and do not initiate any more contact with him. And don't torture yourself over the why's either. Only he and God know why he just ghosted out like that. I can give you a whole list of possible reasons why but none of that matters since he's not interested enough to maintain the connection. Who knows, he might call tomorrow, but in the meantime, put your energy on yourself and those who really care about you instead. I know it's easier said than done (since I often feel the way you do as well, especially when I really like someone because I'm quite picky according to my friends :( :( ), but you can certainly do it. Posting on these boards is a good way to help you resist the urge to contact him and further damage your self-esteem.
Life is too short to delve over him and these negative thoughts. Chin up and enjoy the day! :) :) :)