Confused

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-09-2004
Confused
3
Tue, 11-09-2004 - 12:31am
When I started a new job, I met a really amazing guy. He is 8 years older than me and he has a child with his ex-wife, from whom he seperated around 7 months ago. He treated me different than any of the other women at work. He bought me a hat and he would beg me to visit him on his lunch. We became really close and we exchanged numbers and he told me to call him. I didn't want to seem desperate so I didn't call him and he didn't call me either. We would regularly see each other at work and he would always tell me to call him but I thought that if he was interested he would call, but 2 weeks went by and he never did. I was fed up and so I called him and he said that he lost my number. He said that he was really happy to hear from me and that we should meet up before work. We spent a lot of time together and he told me to visit him on a sunday. We met up and he introduced me to his friends and we hung out for more than 5 hours. At the end of the night he insisted on driving me home and he promised me that we would stay in touch. A week went by and he never called me so I casually text massaged him on his cell wishing him a good day at work. He never replied so I text massaged him again but still no reply. Now it's almost three weeks and nothing. I just want to know why he acted the way that he did if he wasn't interested in me. He was really special to me and I could see myself falling in love with him but now we don't talk at all.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
In reply to: jush292
Thu, 11-11-2004 - 5:12pm
Hello jush, welcome to the board!

 
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to: jush292
Thu, 11-11-2004 - 5:43pm
You're just going to have to deal with this hard fact of life: You cannot always (or hardly ever, really) find out what is in another person's head...what motives his behavior...what he is thinking or feeling, etc. You just have to deal with the reality of what another person does and forget about the WHY. The reality of this situation is the guy is now avoiding you. Stop calling him. You will probably never know why, or what his initial intentions were. Stop torturing yourself and making that your fault. He is still married and no doubt has issues all his own. Because of his marital situation he is not emotionally available to have a new relationship with you or anyone else (not a healthy or successful one, anyway). Time for you to chalk this up as a life lesson learned, remind yourself there's plenty of others out there who will be enthusiastic about meeting and dating you, and look for one of them. Don't settle for this type of situation again -- where you do all the pursuing to the point of looking desperate.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
In reply to: jush292
Thu, 11-11-2004 - 6:03pm

This guy sounds like HE is the one who is confused.

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