Dating Confusion

Avatar for chrysalis2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Dating Confusion
2
Wed, 03-31-2004 - 6:12pm
I read through a lot of the other posts trying to ensure that this isnt a repeat post, and still didnt see my problem, so if this is by chance a repeat, I appologize!

I am 20 years old and have never had a serious relationship with anyone. I have had 1 friends with benefits relationship with a guy for a year now. Basically we just sleep together and have a small talk and then I leave. I of course, have fallen for the guy, but he honestly isnt in it for a relationship, which is cool.

My problem is, that I dont understand why I am never asked on dates or should I say I "infrequently" get asked on dates. And when I am asked out, the only thing the guy seems to want is sex, never just to know me as a person. Im heavy set, but not overly fat, pretty curly red head with green eyes. I know Im not a perfect 10, but Im pretty. Im also very open and funny, and yet they only want sex! I have tried going on a date and stating right off the bat that Im not in it for the sex, that will have to come much later, and then it seems like they get the hell away from me as fast as I can. Is there some kind of vibe that makes men think I would be that way?

Im not sure if I even wrote this in a way that is clear, I hope I did, but I need advice from both men and women. Im so confused!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2003
Sat, 04-03-2004 - 9:07am
It could be the boys you're meeting or it could be the way you're carrying yourself. Women who dress in a certain manner or act a certain way will sometimes be mistaken for those who are loose. Notice what you're saying and see if you're "throwing" yourself at men...

But a lot of times, it's just a numbers game...

Hope this helps.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sat, 04-03-2004 - 10:22am
It's not about vibes - you say "yes" and you are damaging your self esteem - and potentially your health - STD's Aids, pregnancy, higher risk of cervical cancer from multiple partners- by this FWB relationship so you are probably giving out vibes that you are not worth much more than a roll in the hay because that is how you behave.