Dealing with his past...
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| Wed, 07-21-2004 - 3:26pm |
However, I am having trouble dealing with something from his past. The relationship before mine was with a woman who was married. Their relationship lasted about a year, and then they became just friends, about 3 months before I met and started dating him. The woman tried to back away from the friendship, they were best friends. They did for a long time, and they still don't communicate like they used to (the used to talk every day... after the sexual part of the relationship ended). Now they are communicating a bit more than they have a over the last year, and it is really bugging me. He does not talk to her in front of me, nor does he talk about her much. He's been nothing but honest about thier relationship.
She is important to him, but I have a horrible time accepting her in his life. She's older (about 14 years?), has 2 kids, is married, is highly religious, yet she did this to her family. She cheated. Its one of the few moral vilations I truely subscribe to. My boyfriend and I are both in our early 20's, but I think I could marry him. How can I get past this? Should I be honest about how horribly upset her presence makes me? I deserpately don't want to lose him.
Help?

Being ok with their contact basically boils down to whether you trust him or not. I'd frankly have trouble with that given his past behavior. Can you really trust him to make the right choice and keep their friendship platonic, given his past behavior?
Sheri
He really is a wonderful man, and I do not want to leave him. He's very stressed with work right now and I can't bring this up. But soon I will ask him to adjust his behavior with her. Thank you both.
Star*