did something bad...now feeling insecure
Find a Conversation
| Fri, 06-16-2006 - 9:15pm |
Hi everyone,
I have been with my bf for 2 years and we have had our ups and down but for the past several months, we have been very happy and rarely argue. Well I recently went on a vacation without him (I wanted him to come but he couldnt due to work committments)and one night I got very intoxicated (we were drinking for about 10 hours) and I know that when I am that drunk, I am quite out of control. Well, I kissed my friend's friend and I cannot even believe I did that considering that there is nothing (well I do not think there is) that is missing in my relationship with my boyfriend. I love him very much and I would never do anything to intentionally to hurt him. Well here I am. I am back now and I have not seen my boyfriend as he is away himself. He told me he was going out and all of a sudden I started to feel extremely insecure and I have not felt that insecure in a long long time. Of course I know it is caused by what I did because unconsciously I am thinking in my head he might do what I did while I was away. I know that if I tell my boyfriend that I kissed someone while I was away (it was just a kiss and I had no intention to do anything else, I wouldnt cross that line), I know the relationship would be over that moment, no questions about it. So I pretty much know that I will not tell him and I also know that I simply cannot drink to that point again where I am that out of control. So now I am wondering what I can do to stop thinking this way about my boyfriend (which stems from my own mistake), I know he wouldnt cheat on me, he has never given me any reason to doubt him or anything, so that isnt it. What do I do?
| Sat, 06-17-2006 - 3:37am |
