do i have the right???
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do i have the right???
| Fri, 09-24-2004 - 6:58pm |
Alright, I wrote a message on this board a week ago regarding this guy i have been seeing...oookay, now i have another issue.
well okay, i was supposed to go see the guy i have been going out with for about 3 months now tomorrow (saturday) and spend the evening and night with him. he knew and knows that we would not be able to see each other for 3 weeks after this weekend as the weeks are hectic, then next weekend i am going away, then he is going away for the long weekend..so 3 weeks will pass by before we can see each other again.
okay so today at work he sends me an IM and tells me that I should go over to his house at about 7 tomorrow and he can cook me dinner. Then he proceeds to tell me that "at 11, i am going a party" and apparently he had promised to go 8 weeks ago and just forgot bout this bday party. So I would drive there (40 mins away) to spend a few hours with him (which I saw him last weekend the last time) and then he has to go to that party.
So do I have the right to be mad??? He knows we get to spend very little time together and that we wont see each other again for at least 3 weeks yet he still decides it is more important to go to this party instead of spending the evening/night with me???? So when he saw that I was about to lose it, he says "oh you could just stay at mine, i will only be gone for half an hour, an hour tops" I wasnt invited to the party, so I wouldnt want to go...i am very pissed off and sad about this...I feel like everything else/everyone else comes before me, and i told him that...do I have the right to be upset like this???
well okay, i was supposed to go see the guy i have been going out with for about 3 months now tomorrow (saturday) and spend the evening and night with him. he knew and knows that we would not be able to see each other for 3 weeks after this weekend as the weeks are hectic, then next weekend i am going away, then he is going away for the long weekend..so 3 weeks will pass by before we can see each other again.
okay so today at work he sends me an IM and tells me that I should go over to his house at about 7 tomorrow and he can cook me dinner. Then he proceeds to tell me that "at 11, i am going a party" and apparently he had promised to go 8 weeks ago and just forgot bout this bday party. So I would drive there (40 mins away) to spend a few hours with him (which I saw him last weekend the last time) and then he has to go to that party.
So do I have the right to be mad??? He knows we get to spend very little time together and that we wont see each other again for at least 3 weeks yet he still decides it is more important to go to this party instead of spending the evening/night with me???? So when he saw that I was about to lose it, he says "oh you could just stay at mine, i will only be gone for half an hour, an hour tops" I wasnt invited to the party, so I wouldnt want to go...i am very pissed off and sad about this...I feel like everything else/everyone else comes before me, and i told him that...do I have the right to be upset like this???

this is "just dating" - there is no future in dating. When you date - you're supposed to spend the amount of time you want, doing waht you want - with someone that shares those same interests and time requirements, that is it.
You're not "building a future"...that's not how this works.
So he's basically telling you that it is important to him to attend this party - and it's important to him to spend some time with you.
It's not MORE important to go to the party than to be with you - you and the party rank equally in importance with him.
So the question is - are you going to resent him if you drive there and only to spend a few hours with him? Because if you are - you're better off not going down for what you consider an insignificant amount of time, wasting the time and gas...and then resenting him dysfunctionally when you knew before you left - you only had a few hours to spend together.
Erin
quickblade14@hotmail.com
I would also feel somewhat hurt and disappointed by this, but I don't think you should be "mad."
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