Dosn't care of what is important to me
Find a Conversation
| Thu, 12-01-2005 - 9:11pm |
I don't know what is happening. I have been in my relationship with my boyfriend for almost 2 years and 7 months. He tells me constantly that he loves me and everything, but the way he acts uppon that I think is difforint. Like the fact that he has turned down 3 things that was REALLY important to me. Going out dancing with me, going to the states for Christmas (I live in Canada at the moment) and he refusis to take me to the Christmas banquet at school. It isn't like it is going to kill him to go considering it is only one night. Is it truly that difficult to go??
What should I do? I want him to go with me, but at the same time don't want it to sound like I am pressuring him or anything. I NEED HELP!!!
Kristen
I'm 19 by the way and so is he!

kr04...
PG hates to use the fact that the 2 of you are " only 19" as an excuse----but does ANYBODY really know who they wish to be with at the age of 19???
Let me ask you this....
Can you survive the holiday season without him? It's clear that he can make other plans without including YOU? Maybe you should play the same game by keeping your distance from him?
His reaction to your 'change of behavior' MIGHT wake him up a little?
Good Luck!
Pianoguy
Words are cheap, in fact they are free.
Actions are a different matter. You need to explain to him exactly what you you told us here. These things are important to you.
Here are my take on your 3 requirement.
1) Dancing - Some men are very self-conscious on the dance floor. Explain the when, where and how, and exactly what would be expected of him 1 dance, 2 dances, 3 dances? He might want to go.
2) US Trip. Is this a day trip or something more? Where? How long? How much will it cost? If he doesn't have the money or the time, don't expect him to do it.
3) Banquet - He needs to take you, this should not be optional
If he can't agree to the banquet I would think that this is a relationship of convenience for him.
How freakin' frustrating!
I'm curious... have you had a non-threatening conversation about this? Like:
"I understand how you feel about going dancing. I'm curious why you feel that way?"
"I understand that you odn't want to accompany me to the banquet, and I'm not going to push you. But, I am really curious WHY you don't want to go?"
Word it so he doesn't think you're nagging him to do it, but ask him why he feels as he does. His reaction, as well as his answer, will tell you tons.
Barb
We could use a little more info here, hon.
Start