Engagement & Stress!
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| Mon, 05-10-2004 - 2:12pm |
Due to financial reasons, it makes a great deal of sense for me to move in with my boyfriend in a couple of months when my apartment lease is up. He agrees with that, although, we both would rather be engaged when living together (to please our families).
My boyfriend had orginally planned on proposing to me by the first of next year. This living arrangement reality has caused us to think about speeding up the engagement process. My boyfriend is concerned about having to feel "rushed" in the engagement process.
After much discussion, I've learned that purchasing the ring isn't his largest concern. He simply feels that the "spontaneity factor" won't exist, since I will be expecting to get engaged before my apartment lease is up. He has always imagined that the proposal would be a complete surprise, which would in part be ruined by this time frame that we have encountered.
I have already checked with my apartment office, and my rental fee would increase by $300 per month if I opted to a month-to-month lease. I just can't justify paying that extra money in effort to make the engagement act more of a surprise.
Is there anyway that I can get my boyfriend to see things in a different light? I think that he still can plan a surprise engagement, even if I will be expecting it to happen. I won't know HOW it will happen. Shouldn't that be enough of a surprise?

Last week, his mother expressed how honored she would feel if he were to present me with the diamond from her wedding ring. My boyfriend's father passed away a couple of years ago, and his mother wants to keep the ring in the family. That pretty much solved the issue of financial strain of purchasing an engagement ring.
The only concern now is the "surprise factor" of engagement that he feels won't be present.
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