Ex is still calling

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-13-2006
Ex is still calling
16
Tue, 12-11-2007 - 8:27pm

I have another question that I'm wondering about.


I dated a guy a while ago.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2004
Sun, 12-16-2007 - 9:52am
Wow! I wonder if we were with the same guy - LOL. My ex was the same too, I was with him 2 years, took 4 breaks-up to finally stick to my guns. As you said too, I don't know what keep me going back or staying in the relationship - I don't know what keep me in it for so long too when I knew of the red flags, I guess I was waiting for empty promises, wanted to give him a chance, and not look back later and say I was being too hard/picky. I do know for a fact I wasn't, being broken up for 1.5 years now was the best thing I could have done for myself. A huge weight lifted off my shoulders, I am so at peace being me and totally enjoying myself as who I am, not who someone elese wanted me to be. My ex did not understand why I broke up with him, would always tell me how could you dump me, and I could just never understand how he always begged me to be with him, phone calls/cards/un-expected visits to my home. At the fourth breakup to get over him for good in not letting myself get back, I threw everything out that he had given me because I did not want to be reminded of him in thinking maybe I should try getting back again, I never returned his calls, threw cards and gifts away. I broke up with him Aug 06, he called me on Thanksgiving 06 to ask me if I was coming back, and then again sent me a card Jul 07 saying he's worried about me, did not know what to say, not even an I am sorry for what I've done or acknowledged anything bad he did to me, and asking me to call him. I threw the card away and got very angry because I thought here he does not know what to say - I thought please, after the crap he put me through, at the end of the relationship lying and being a jerk which was causing me to get sick. I would say it was my body's way of telling me to get out for good. I did get out for good and will not return. It's interesting how I was the one doing all the breakups and he was the one doing all the begging for me not to leave/come back.

Anna


Anna

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2005
Sun, 12-16-2007 - 11:36am

Hi Anna,


I just wanted to reply with a "good for you!!!"


This is a toast to us;


To the guys who have us,


To the losers who had us,


And to the lucky guys who will meet us!


Cheers!


Holly


P.S. I love your avatar. I have a black and white tuxedo kitty myself. :-)


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2007
Sun, 12-16-2007 - 12:17pm
Well said holly!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2004
Sun, 12-16-2007 - 12:18pm

He's my Baby, he's about 1.5 years. I got him when I broke up with ex the third time around as a replacement, someone/something to love/focus on. I adopted him at the SPCA, when I walked in he was the loudest one meowing and climbing the cage; the lady said he was the last one left of his family. After I picked him up and looked around, could not put him back in the cage because of all the fuss he made to get my attention. He talks to me by making his cat noise, don't know how to describe the meow noice he makes and when I talk to him he moves his tail back and forth. He's spoiled rotten, my teenager boys tell me that I treat him like a baby. All of a sudden with his winter coat this year, he's huge and now that he's older he does not let me hold him like a baby like I used to.


I like your poem, when we do meet the special man, he will be very lucky to have us and us have him. It's worth the wait, not worth settling just to have someone. Especially we we can be free enjoying ourselves until the special one comes along.

I wish you well in meeting your special man and when you do let us all know. Happy Holidays!

Anna


Anna

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2007
Sun, 12-16-2007 - 2:42pm
My cat is very vocal too.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2004
Mon, 12-17-2007 - 4:09pm

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