Excuses

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2006
Excuses
12
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 5:33pm
I have a question. I went out on New Years Eve with a guy that I had met at my hair salon of all places. Our hairstylist has our appts set up back to back so we can get to know each other. I had several reservations about him. For one, he's newly divorced and has a lot of issues to deal with. I thought what would one date hurt; after all, I had never been on a date on New Years Eve or for awhile for that matter. I ended up having a good time with him. When he dropped me off he asked me if I had a good time and if I'd like to go out again and I said yes. He said he'd call me. Well weeks went by without a phone call. I saw him again at the salon about a month after that. I didn't bring up the fact that he had not called. He started talking about how busy he was and that is why he didn't call. I just said "don't you have a cellphone?" Before he left he said he'd call me. Well again weeks have gone by with no phone call. Maybe he is busy, but if a guy says he's going to call then I think he should. If he is interested then he should act like it and call. To me it makes him appear to be unreliable and not really interested. Why do men think they need to tell us they are going to call? Why can't they keep the departure short and sweet instead of sugar coating it with a bunch of lies.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
In reply to: free2bme421
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 5:48pm

Strange... I was just talking to my friend about this tonight!


A few reasons come to mind. First, he doesn't want to hurt your feelings and doesn't know how to handle the fact that he didn't keep his word. Second, he may just be taking you for granted, thinking that you'll be around for him.


So what to do? Next time you see him, if he mentions the lack of call again, just let him know that you're not interested. Tell him you don't have the time for excuses...


Hope this helps.


Kerry


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2006
In reply to: free2bme421
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 6:21pm

I'll see him again on Tuesday when I get my hair done. He knows that we have back to back appts. He knew that I was going to be there last time and he waited for me. I would think if he really wasn't interested he would avoid seeing me, but who knows. He has said all along that he doesn't want to get involved with anyone, but yet he asked me if I'd like to go out again. He's crazy if he thinks I'm going to wait for him.

Thanks for the advice. I'll keep it in mind the next time I see him.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
In reply to: free2bme421
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 6:56pm

Please, listen to his words. If he's telling you he doesn't want to get involved and you want something more than a casual fling, then please do not get involved with him. People usually tell you things upfront but we have a tendency of not listening and hoping for something else... Listen to those words, they speak volumes!


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2006
In reply to: free2bme421
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 7:11pm
I don't know if I want to get involved with him at all, especially now. He should have not asked me if I wanted to go out again if he didn't want to. I think it's best to stay away from him until he's ready and that's what I plan to do. I've been thinking about asking my hairstylist to schedule my appt for a different time than his next time, but what will he think? Better yet why do I even care what he thinks?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
In reply to: free2bme421
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 7:34pm

That's just the point, you shouldn't care.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
In reply to: free2bme421
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 7:35pm
Exactly girl! Who cares what he thinks? Hell I would walk in, looking hot, walk right past him, nod and say hi and not give him a minute to say anything. :o)

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2006
In reply to: free2bme421
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 7:39pm
Sounds good to me! Make him drool and then walk away. :-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2006
In reply to: free2bme421
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 7:46pm
You're right, he's not worth it. He's not reliable and having someone that is is very important to me. Like I always say, there's always more and better fish in the sea. There's a guy in my dance class that's starting to look good to me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
In reply to: free2bme421
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 7:47pm
Darn right!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2006
In reply to: free2bme421
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 8:13pm
Oh, he'll hear about how I'm learning to dance and I'm out there having fun.

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