Excuses

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2006
Excuses
12
Sun, 02-19-2006 - 5:33pm
I have a question. I went out on New Years Eve with a guy that I had met at my hair salon of all places. Our hairstylist has our appts set up back to back so we can get to know each other. I had several reservations about him. For one, he's newly divorced and has a lot of issues to deal with. I thought what would one date hurt; after all, I had never been on a date on New Years Eve or for awhile for that matter. I ended up having a good time with him. When he dropped me off he asked me if I had a good time and if I'd like to go out again and I said yes. He said he'd call me. Well weeks went by without a phone call. I saw him again at the salon about a month after that. I didn't bring up the fact that he had not called. He started talking about how busy he was and that is why he didn't call. I just said "don't you have a cellphone?" Before he left he said he'd call me. Well again weeks have gone by with no phone call. Maybe he is busy, but if a guy says he's going to call then I think he should. If he is interested then he should act like it and call. To me it makes him appear to be unreliable and not really interested. Why do men think they need to tell us they are going to call? Why can't they keep the departure short and sweet instead of sugar coating it with a bunch of lies.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
In reply to: free2bme421
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 2:19pm

He thinks if he told you the truth you'd be totally devasted (a bit of ego there!!!) so would rather not face that he's the cause of such devastation and so does the lying thing instead. He feels better. You feel yanked around. Next time you see him say it's fine he never called again, you're not sitting by phone waiting but you would have appreciated the courtesy of him not lying vs the prevaricating. Truth is better than lying. You can also mention you're dating a hot terrific guy! :)
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2006
In reply to: free2bme421
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 6:42pm
I saw him at the salon the other day. He had his 9-year-old daughter with him so he didn't mention anything about not calling like he has in the past. Maybe he brought her because he knew he'd be safe from any altercation with me. We talked a little, mostly small talk, but I threw in a few comments that made him think that I'm looking elsewhere. I also made a point to tell my hairstylist while he was there that I wanted to move my appt up so he would know not to expect me there next time. Like I told my hairstylist after he left, there's always more and better fish in the sea. What really gets me is he went out of his to ask me if I'd like to go again and said he'd call. Why go out of your way to ask a gal if she wants to go out again if you have no intention of calling her? It's very misleading. He's proven himself to be a liar and unreliable. He's just another jerk to add to my ever growing list.

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