fallen for a PLAYER

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2004
fallen for a PLAYER
3
Thu, 12-02-2004 - 4:18pm
Ok so I met this guy at work and we have been friends for almost two years. I always told myself he was a "Player" as a security blanket so that I wouldn't fall for him. I told him that I had to look out for me and that is why I always tell him he is a player because I dont want to get hurt. He in turn said that he would never do that to me! He has always been respectful, upfront and honest with me. I told him from the beginning that I was abstaining from sex and he never questioned it nor pressured me. We talk all the time and he calls me from work and when he is on his way home from work, and our conversations are not brief. We have slept together several times and he hasnt stopped talking to me. My problem now is that I have fallen for him, I told myself I wouldnt and I don't know if I should tell him or how I should go about the situation. SHould I just continue on with the way things are like I am cool with just being "friends with benefits" should I cut off the intimacy, cut him off all together? I just dont want to get hurt. Your thoughts......
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
Thu, 12-02-2004 - 6:06pm
Hello kaylaface, welcome to the board!

 
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Fri, 12-03-2004 - 12:45pm

Just remember it was YOUR decision to sleep with him.

 Start

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-09-2004
Fri, 12-03-2004 - 4:26pm
Hey girl,here is my BEST advice...If you have fallen in love with him, but he's a player, and you guys work together, DO NOT keep getting involved. Yes, I know exactly how you feel.
I've know this guy at work for 3 years, and we are "best friends with benefits" as well.
It is getting to a point where it affects my work, because he goes on breaks with other girls, and of course, he has all the rights. But let me tell you how my heart skips a beat everytime I see this happening. And we talk on the phone every night, our offices are right besides each other, we have lunch every day...and still it hurts. I can't say anything, because,after all, we are "friends with benefits".
But, if I had to go back 3.5 years ago, I'd never get sexually involved with him. He is an excellent friend, we talk about anything, I know his familly...yet again...
So, this is my advice. DO talk to him, but if he doesn't want to commit, just be friends.
Let me know how it goes.