Falling for child's uncle????

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2004
Falling for child's uncle????
1
Mon, 06-28-2004 - 1:56pm
I have been in a relationship with my daughter's uncle for about 10 months now. Her father and I have not been together for almost nine years. Things just happened as they always do. On top of his relationship to my daughter, he is also 20 and I am 28. I think we are starting to get really serious. Recently I just told him we need to sit and talk about where we are going with this. No one in his family is aware of what is going on between us. My family is not aware either. I feel that I am falling in love with him, but I don't know if this relationship is wrong??? My friends tell me I should start thinking about myself and if he makes me happy who cares what others think. Any advice??????
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 06-30-2004 - 12:31pm
Ignoring the uncle connection to your child, I firmly believe that a 20 year old (no matter how mature you find him) is not ready to step into a ready made family. The guy has little or no life experience...how long has he been out of his mother's house, two years?? I don't think that you've thought this through. You're light years ahead of this guy in life experiences, not just years.

And consider what's going to happen if you do continue this relationship and it doesn't work out, do you trust him not to take it out on your child? Will he continue to hang out with his niece or will he blow her off so that he doesn't have to come into contact with you?