Falling for a man on verge of break up..
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| Wed, 09-07-2005 - 3:29pm |
I was previously in a 6 yrs relationship, and the break up was very painful. It has been over a year and a half and I havent really dated anyone seriously...part of it was by choice as I have not met anyone that I want to settle down with. I am now already in my mid - late 20s, do not have time for games...
Anyway, about a month ago, through a mutual friend I met this man who, for the first time, I feel a connection with. He is very honest with me about everything - including the fact that he has a girlfriend. However, he and his girlfriend (whom he has been iwht only a little over a year) have been fighting and have broken up a few times. It has been on and off for them, and sometimes he tells me he has this gut feeling that she might not be the one for him, but he cares about her and it's hard to let go. At the same time, he calls me every single day, he tells me he doesnt want to let me go either because maybe I am the one for him...right now he is just very confused.
I on the other hand, is slowly falling for him as we continue to communicate and see each other (we have not slept together or anything). I try not to take him too seriously but it's hard when you start to develop real feelings for someone. But it makes me upset because I also feel like the "other" woman....
He seems to be just as confused as I am...just like the other day, he wanted to come see me but then his "other half" (what he calls her) asked him to accompany her to run some errands, and he decided to bail out on me just so he can avoid another fight with her. I sense that he is unhappy, I also sense that he wants to work things out with her but it just doesnt seem possible (he even showed me a scratch she left on his face from a fight), at the same time, I also sense that he likes me a lot and sometimes question maybe he should be with me instead but I guess the feeling is still new and he has a hard time letting go of a year relationship...am i just there as a security rebound? to make him feel better in a failed relationship?
sorry for blabbing...but im just not sure where this is going. I know I'm probably going to end up getting hurt if I continue to see him, but is it possible that this might end up as a fairy tale ending for me? or is there no hope at all??

Hi charlotte!
Pianoguy was humming the song as he was thinking of a suitable response to your question.
It's just one man's opinion, but I think you're taking an awful risk waiting for this 'gentleman' to leave his current g/f in favor of yourself? The reason is simple.
If there's was HONEST DISHARMONY BETWEEN THE 2 OF 'EM....they wouldn't keep "reuniting" again and again. One or both would END THINGS permanently.
Since the man isn't 'completely ready' to ditch the current g/f...do you HONESTLY want to sit and wait by the telephone for voice confirmation? Or are you willing to let him TAKE ACTION by permanently cancelling out his current relationship BEFORE he takes up with you?
Pianoguy
I think the best thing you can do in this situation is to STOP talking to him for now, and ask him to call you IF AND WHEN he breaks up with his gf.
Sheri