Follow up-- knock some sense into me?
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| Thu, 04-15-2004 - 3:00pm |
Well, he didn't call. Mind you, we don't typically talk every day. We've even gone a couple of days without talking, actually. Who knows, he may have gotten home late-- he never calls me late and typically does not answer his phone past 8:30pm because he goes to bed early. However, I'm one of those types who gets EXTREMELY nervous when I don't hear from someone I'm involved with because of my own past "Daddy" issues. Important to know-- he has no idea that I have this anxiety about the calling thing, and I've never discussed it with him because I don't know if it is worth discussing because: 1) it's my own issue; and 2) I cannot and don't want to change who he is, because who he is is who I fell for in the first place.
I had posted here for my girlfriend a few days ago about the calling thing, but now I'm the one fretting. Perhaps if we had not had a "talk" the previous night I wouldn't be so nervous, but I feel this anxiety about not hearing from him last night. I did call him, but his machine picked up and I didn't leave a message. This really brought me back to when he did his freaking out thing a few months ago-- he admitted back then to not picking up the phone because he was afraid to talk to me. However, I don't want to start freaking out about nothing. I really want to be able to be okay with not hearing from him and assuming the worst, because my anxiety is my own issue that I want to be able to sort through and work out. If this is the worst thing he will do in our relationship (everything else between us has been great, and I'm not saying that blindly-- we really do feel like friends and lovers), I don't want to ruin it with my own issues. This is why I have not brought up the calling thing to him-- I really do want to able to get past it. However, should I get past it, or do I have reason to panic? Or should I just focus on getting into a healthier mindset about it? This is where I'm confused. How right or wrong am I about my anxiety of his not always calling when he says he will call, or try to call? Is this a sign of pulling back? Is he just assuming we are going to talk to each other regardless of when, and do I just need to let it go and work on my issue?
I'm always open to brutal honesty, which is why I've been posting here. :) You guys are great. I feel like my hand had been held since the beginning.

On the not calling thing, I wouldn't stress unless this becomes a habit. One missed call is just that...one missed call. What good would panicking do, anyway?
Sheri