Frustrated

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2004
Frustrated
3
Wed, 12-08-2004 - 11:43am

I am frustrated/disappointed!!

I started work at a big firm a few months ago. There was a guy who started at the same time. I saw him a few times and then he emailed me out of the blue. We bantered a bit and then we coordinated a work social event. We ended up going to a party together last weekend and having a great time. We stayed out until dawn talking. We held hands and kissed, and he walked me home like a perfect gentleman.

On Monday he emailed me first thing and invited me to lunch. Disaster! I felt so awkward ... I wasn't as flirty because we were at a place nearby work and I was so nervous around him that I kept laughing and he kept asking what I was laughing at.

We've had a few email banters since, but he hasn't asked me out, and doesn't seem like he will. I haven't seen him at all since the awkward lunch (because we are in separate departments/floors).

I wish I could redo the way I did lunch!! I don't chase boys, because I believe that if they are really intersted in me they will pursue me. But, I'm just disappointed I acted so nervously at lunch....

Thoughts?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2004
In reply to: ioveranalyze
Wed, 12-08-2004 - 12:11pm
It's normal. Nothing wrong with women going up to men and asking themm out to lunch or for a drink.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2004
In reply to: ioveranalyze
Wed, 12-08-2004 - 12:16pm

I will ask my guy friends out to lunch or drinks, no problem, but not someone I'm interested in.

And I can't ask this guy, especially now after we've kissed. If he had had a great time at lunch, he would have asked me out again.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2004
In reply to: ioveranalyze
Wed, 12-08-2004 - 1:25pm

Hi,

Maybe because you weren't flirty at the lunch he thinks that you really aren't interested. You might want to let him know that you were nervous and wondered if he noticed. I wouldn't ask him out, just tell him how you were feeling. He may be relieved to hear it and next time it could very well be dinner, somewhere not close to work. Good luck. Lucy