Furry man has stolen my heart. HELP:!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
Furry man has stolen my heart. HELP:!
4
Sat, 10-23-2004 - 9:03pm
Ok, this is retarded and shallow. I know it, so you don't have to tell me.

I've been dating a great new guy for little over a month now. He's absolutely wonderful -- sweet, charming, funny, generous and an amazing lover. There is only one problem. OMG he is soooooo hairy. I am not one of those women who wants a man to be smooth as a baby's bottom, but come on! I can deal with the chest hair, leg, arms, etc. But he's got hairy shoulders and the top portion of his back. AND it's BLACK! I'm cringing as I type it even. I don't know what to do/say about it. I don't want to say "hey sasquatch, could ya wax or something?" I would rather die than make him feel insecure or unattractive. Especially since he's so flattering and complimentary to me and oblivious to my own physical flaws. I know I should appreciate him for who he is, fuzz and all, but good lord. I don't want to lose/ruin what may be an amazing relationship over some fur. Is there anything I can do?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 10-24-2004 - 10:31am
shugahgrrl...

Buy 2 or 3 tubes of NAIR....the hair-removal cream. The next time the two of you get really passionate, you can always tell SASQUATCH that you want to give him a FULL BODY MASSAGE and that he's not permitted to move until you're finished!

Apply the cream only to the areas that REALLY bother you! But be sure you have a couple of large towels handy after you're done...the bed is probably gonna be very...err...black! :)

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
Sun, 10-24-2004 - 1:12pm
OKay pianoguy, but how do I explain the fact that he's now hair-free? I don't think there's a way to get rid of the problem without him noticing. I know I don't want to just tell him that it's bugging me. That would embarass the crap out of me were I in his position. I have joked about it as innocently as possible and he doesn't seem to be self conscious about it at all. I feel like such a jerk for being down on a part of him that he apparently has accepted about himself. I will admit also that if I say something directly about it that that's going to open the door for a discussion of each other's flaws. God knows I don't want to hear about mine, lol. I guess what I am asking is : Is there a nonconfrontational way to nudge him in the hairfree direction so that he makes the decision without hurting his feelings or embarassing him?

C'mon, there has to been some women with fuzzy guys at home that can help me!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Sun, 10-24-2004 - 4:36pm
It is difficult when you unlucky enough to have too much/too little body hair according to "acceptable" standards, but when the person you love makes an issue out of it, it's even worse. Have you ever noticed that in movies and television the person with too much/too little hair (either male or female) is often the butt of jokes? Be thankful you are not one of those people being made fun of. If you are afraid to be with a man who is the butt of juvenile, moronic jokes, then by all means set him free. Go get yourself someone that you find presentable (and hope that he finds you presentable too). Iri
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
Sun, 10-24-2004 - 6:03pm
Well thankfully I haven't had to deal with anyone making jokes about him. I don't think anyone would (at least where he could hear it) as he is a huge guy (6'6") and could palm their head like a basketball should the urge so take him. I can appreciate your point of view, but I absolutely refuse to discard a wonderful person and/or relationship because of a little hair. That is why I was asking what to do in the first place. I know how I would feel if someone dumped me based on a purely superficial and easily remedied problem. The problem isn't what to do with the fur, that's easy. I'm a girl -- hair removal is something I devote a lot of my own personal grooming time to. The problem is how to nudge him in the direction of hair removal without making him uncomfortable or hurt. If it comes down to it and it's deal with it or dump him over it then I will deal with it. He's too great in every other regard. There just won't be many trips to the beach on the agenda. Maybe I'll learn how to ski and buy him a lot of turtlenecks, lol.