Ghosting...
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Ghosting...
| Sun, 07-29-2007 - 7:29pm |
Why do so many guys just disappear? Even when things are going absolutely fine, not a wrinkle or bump in sight...they just vanish, literally without explanation. I don't think anything can be more hurtful to a girl. Especially when there was a very regular routine of contact, going out. I was seeing the absolute sweetest, most considerate guy for two weeks, or what I thought was a sweet, considerate guy. Both of us have been through a lot, and have shared experiences, thoughts, etc. neither of us has shared before, because we were afraid to. We had great chemistry, there was an easy give and take of friendship between us as well as definite physical attraction. Now he has just disappeared, no call, email, etc. of any sort of explanation. I called him, just once, to ask if everything was ok as we had made plans to get together today. I've yet to hear back. I know I have not know him all that long but this is very out of character for him, meaning, when this has happened before in the past, the guy was usually a jerk from the beginning. This guy was not at all. He definitely seems like if things were not working out for whatever reason, he would tell me. Why do so many guys hurt girls this way? This guy was so different, he treated me so well, if a guy like that can just turn, forget it, I'm not dating anymore...the pain and confusion of this has become too much to bear. I'd rather just deal with the occasional bouts of feeling lonely by myself.

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I'm so sorry you had to go through this experience. It's very hurtful, especially because here was someone who seemed different.
I agree with you. Somehow men see dating as a sport where they need to "win" and women are the enemy until you make them become submissive and compliant. They want a society of women to walk around with abandonment complexes. Why? I dont' know because when they are good and ready to settle down they are going to have to foot the bill for the complex they installed (as a society of men with oaths and everything) in our minds years earlier.
It would make sense for men who display unattractive qualities early on. But hopefully we cut them loose early on too. Men who appear to be responsible and nice and who ghost are either cowards, passive aggressive types, or sickos who like tormenting women with trauma.
What I have been noticing is that when some men decide to come back to the woman they ghosted on they have some crazy story about a father dying in southeast asia or something bizarre like that, hehe.
No one has officially ever ghosted on me. One or two may have attempted a bit of a pull back routine. I didn't care for that treatment back then and I wouldn't appreciate it now.
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