Girlfriend vs my daughter
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Girlfriend vs my daughter
| Sat, 11-06-2004 - 1:40pm |
I have a dilema, I have been in a divorce for the past 21 months and just finalized last week! My ex has moved 15 times in this time period and we share custody of my 12 year old daughter with near 50/50 placement. I have been seeing a girl that I have strong feelings for. My problem is my daughter does not like her for the fact that the girlfriend holds very stong morals and is very blunt to situations, cut and dry. Yes my daughter is somewhat spoiled but she is a very good kid and she knows what I expect etc. I live in a town other than my girlfriend. In order to keep 50/50 I must live in the same school dist as the ex and I wouldn't have it any other way as I am the one that assists my daughter with school work etc. Her grades have been slipping and I feel it is due to the unrest in her living situation (I have to sell the farm due to divorce) as I/we are not sure where we are going to call home and mom has rollers on all of her furniture. Anyway.... Girlfriend and I get into spats on issues with my daughter and some have been dilly's!! I try to talk things out with her but nothing is resolved.. my daughter does not want anything to do with her or her kids! What is a guy to do?? I feel the relationship is doomed at this point. Should I keep going on or end it now??? My daughter comes first and I feel girlfriend is jealous for the time we spend together since I can't be with her all my free moments.

How long have you been dating this woman? How was the introduction done and how soon after you started to date? What are your spats about, exactly? Parenting? What sort of stuff are you arguing about? It doesn't sound good to me if you're both arguing to win instead of trying to resolve things (reading between the lines when you say they're dillies).
I think you're right about this woman not being a good fit for your family. You may have feelings for her, but do you really think that you're going to be able to live together in one household AND have a moment of peace between the two women? Or are you going to have a kid rebeling, rebeling, rebeling and leaving as soon as she can.
I'd end the relationship, the girlfriend sounds controlling and to be jealous of a child is immature. Whose the adult here?