Going on third date, what to do?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2005
Going on third date, what to do?
3
Fri, 07-07-2006 - 12:14am

Okay here is what is going on. I met this guy on the internet about 5 months ago and we started chatting and getting to know each other really well. A couple of weeks ago, we went out on our first date to the bowling alley. I creamed him, but I had apologized in advanced just to warn him that I am a pretty decent bowler. We bowled a few games then went to sit down to talk. We talked for 2 hours on religion, politics and lots of other stuff. Our second date was yesterday (7/6) and we went out to dinner then I showed him around my town. It was fun and when we got back to the restaurant parking lot, we kind of just stood there not knowing what to do. The last time I went on a second date, it was to see a theatrical production at my college. And also I have never had the whole experience of dating so this is all new to me. I told him that and he is the same way. Our third date is this Sunday and we are going to watch my city's fireworks display. When we were saying goodbye, we weren't sure if we had to hug each other or just shake hands. We gave each other a hug but not a nice, "i like you a lot" kind of hug. We've talked about everything we could possibly talk about and there was some silence at the table as well. I need you, ladies, who have experienced dating more than me and to tell me what I need to do. I like this guy but since this is the first guy that is going on a third date with me, I need to know what to do and how to act and what to talk about.

Please help!
Sarah

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
Fri, 07-07-2006 - 12:31am
Hi there, I wouldn't stress about talking constantly on a date. It's OK to have those silences, you both are still getting to know each other. The non-stop talking could be more overwhelming than not. Given that both of you are new to dating go slowly and do what comes naturaly. If you want to hug him go ahead or just shake his hand. The "I like you a lot hugs" don't come easily when you first start dating, at least in my experience. I'd suggest to let him plan the next date...he should be able to come up with something special to do and should consult with you before making final arraigments.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 07-07-2006 - 7:23am

daisygal10...

You asked for a woman's opinion, but you're gonna get a man's point of view too!

Pianoguy thinks HUGS are great! Simply because they can be affectionate displays of caring for another human being...and nothing more! They're also a great way to avoid "lip locking" if one partner isn't completely interested in the other!

If the gentleman you're dating has a CD (or cassette tape) player in his car, truck or mini-van....take a couple of your favorites along with you...and "let the music do the talking!" You can always start the conversation with "I LOVE THIS ARTIST AND WANTED YOU TO HEAR SOME OF HIS (OR HER) STUFF!"

So that takes care of the ride over to the fireworks.

After the display is over...head for the nearest ice cream parlor and offer to buy him a cone, a sundae or something similar? Your mouths will be busy 'digesting' the ice cream!

Now the tricky part....and that's the drive back?

You might want to reveal a few of your personal feelings about the gentleman...which could be good, bad or indifferent? Then see what sort of a response he gives you! Don't assume or expect the obvious---because Men DON'T ALWAYS RESPOND the way women expect them too!

After you bring up the subject of feelings...the 2 of you are on your own!

Good Luck!

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Fri, 07-07-2006 - 4:36pm
You can talk about how awkward you feel in a casual way, it sounds like he feels the same. Just keep planning fun activities and see how things go. There's no right or wrong here - just be yourself and enjoy
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