guys hyper dramatic gestures indimidate
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| Thu, 01-26-2006 - 7:56pm |
Need some advice. Recently there's been a guy who within the last couple months has made it very clear he's interested in me. Lets see, there have been car chases, he's been tailing me in dance class, imitating my moves with psyche sitrring direct eye contact.
All of this is well and flattering but 1) a kind of a sledgehammer method that intimidates me and 2) there has been a past where he's witnessed was a part of an event of me crushed by such behavior (ie A teacher I was infatuated with coming on by flirting obssessively with a girl student next to me yet constantly mentioning topics that interest me.) I hope I'm above that bull. I've been married several years and divorced several. I do like him. However, he's a decade younger and...in my classes (what if it doesnt work out...I'd be crushed and couldnt attend classes).
When I asked someone for advice like why doesnt he just talk, he just said "well YOU should ask him out for coffee.He's moved on..." But I value discretion, with such overly dramatized public gestures, water under the bridge, wouldnt know where to begin to approach it. An now that he's caught my attention I find I'm just fearful of hurt (see number two) In the last class he began flirting with another girl.
I should talk with him.... What should I say?

This guy sounds like he is a bit emotionally unstable. Chasing you in his car?!?! That is frightening, not flattering.
Steer clear of him. If you did wind up going out, I could see him wind up being one of those freaky stalker types that won't go away when you finally dump them because you realize how unstable they actually are. Let the other girl have him. He also sounds like a player. When he couldn't get your interest through his odd behavior, he's moved on to his next "victim".
It sounds to me like you have a slight case of "grass is greener." You weren't entirely comfortable with this person's behavior initially, but now that he seems to be directing his attention elsewhere, you miss the flattery.
You already know the answer to your dilemma. Something about him made you pause before, and he really hasn't given you any reason to reconsider. So, why should you?