He asked me to call but didn't mean it

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
He asked me to call but didn't mean it
3
Fri, 01-27-2006 - 1:18am

Recently, a guy told me to feel free to call him if I ever wanted to get together. I called him on Monday nite, to see if he was available on Tues or Thurs of this week. We had a nice chat. He said he'd call me back and let me know about getting together.

He hasn't called back. It's Thurs nite. I guess this means he's not interested. I won't call him back. But why do men play games... why ask me to call if you're not into me. Due to his profession, he is a busy man. But, even busy people find time for someone they really want to see or speak with.

We attend the same church. Sunday will be awkward. I may stay home.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-24-2005
Fri, 01-27-2006 - 1:53am
Don't forgo church because of him. Attend it. Stay cheerful when you meet him. Greet him and then let him speak. See what he says, and whether he volunteers anything. It is hard to answer the 'why he did not call' part. Most likely, he will mention something. I would only go as far as letting him know I was wondering why he did not call, and that's it. Let him suggest getting together, instead of you doing it again. Don't show your disappointment or upset when you meet him. Try to remain lighthearted. If he doesn't suggest anything directly or hint at anything, I would let it/him go. My 2 cents.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Fri, 01-27-2006 - 12:23pm

If you don't go, you let him know that what he did affected you. It might have, but don't back down because you are not the one that was wrong here.

Personally, I think that when a guy asks a woman to call him so they can do something sometime, that is the brushoff there. If he really wanted to do something, he'd ask you or call you. He may be thinking that you'll never call or that at least it puts it off so that he can come up with another way to postpone things when/if you do call.

So go to church and be friendly but only just past cordial. Wait for him to approach you. If you want to say something in a non-accusatory way of, "hey, you said you'd call..." but don't act upset and if you think you might act upset, don't say it.

Good luck but IMO, you should want a guy that acts interested in you and makes an effort. If he doesn't, move on.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2004
Fri, 01-27-2006 - 12:33pm

adding a link to an article I read recently on ivillage called why don't men call when they say they will.

http://love.ivillage.com/lnsunderstandmen/whathedoes/0,,doyenne_747,00.html

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting