He Brings a Girlfriend
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| Mon, 05-15-2006 - 12:11am |
Hi... I haven't posted in a while. When I did post I posted about a guy I met back in October. He gave me his phone number and I gave him mine. I called him and we started a connection. He called me a lot. So I thought he was interested but he never asked me out. A week before the Christmas holiday I asked him if he wanted to get together after the holidays since he was so busy. He said definitely and that he would talked to me before Christmas. He did not called. So of course I was upset and confused and I called him in January. We did not talk long since he said he would call me later. He never did. I sent him a birthday card in February and did not hear from him. So I spoke to friends of his who I am close with and asked them what was going on. They advised me to call him that he was very busy and that "things" seemed to have slowed down for him. So I called and left a message. He called me and left a message saying he was meaning to call me and "thanked" me for the card. We have been playing phone tag so we haven't spoken over the phone like we use to. He called me two weeks ago (left a message) to "catch up" since he hadn't spoken to me in ages. I called to let me know I would stop by his business to say "hi". But I couldn't get there and I did not hear from him. Well... this weekend at an event that we were both going to be at (not together) he shows up with a girlfriend. He knew I was going to be there. This girl sat at this event for 9 hours then joined our group later for dinner. I was mad. Although nothing official started for this guy and I, I am confused. Why would he call me two weeks prior to this event and then show up with a girlfriend. I think his friends that we both know would have said something to me when I asked about him. So this girlfriend is very recent. Actually they did not know her so I know she is very recent. If she is recent, okay, but why bring her if she was going to sitting by herself most of the time while he and I participate in this event. Others were in this event as well so it wasn't just him and I.
Was he telling me to "go over him" or was he just being a jerk? (or both)
Thanks,
PS: Is Painoguy at this board?

Hi.. thanks.. but wouldn't him calling me for a month and half constitute some type of relationship? He was the one who initiated the contact and calls. I was trying to initiate contact with him after he walked away.
Just making sure that I understand his first step. Again, he initiated our contact.
Thanks again though.
Sounds more like he was hanging onto all his options just in case he couldn't find someone. I'd be grateful he was gone.
Cheryl
Cheryl
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"I thought he was interested but he never asked me out."
That should have been enough to let you know this guy wasn't really into starting anything up with you.
He might have started out being mildly attracted to you, but somewhere along the line he either lost interest or he met someone else. My guess is he didn't have the heart to tell you "I'm not interested," or he wanted to keep you "on hold" in case he changed his mind. So he left one polite "thank you" message for your card, and he called you once two weeks ago to catch up. But you never had any relationship with this man. Therefore, he didn't do anything wrong by bringing his new girlfriend to the event.
Just chalk it up to an educational experience. Next time, just remember this... no matter what happens when you first meet, a man who is truly interested in you will try to see you and spend time with you.
Take care, and better luck!