He is getting COLD FEET!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2004
He is getting COLD FEET!
6
Sun, 10-17-2004 - 9:44pm
I am engaged to be married and he just told me that he doesn't know whether it is going to work out..... My question is, what is everyone's opinion on the engagement ring....if he breaks it off, do I keep the ring or does he get it back???? Looking for some feedback.

Thanks!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-23-2004
Sun, 10-17-2004 - 9:50pm
The honorable thing to do is to return the ring.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2004
Sun, 10-17-2004 - 10:41pm
I think that if you were to break it off then it would be best to return the ring. But... If he breaks it off I say keep it. You deserve it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2004
Mon, 10-18-2004 - 12:41am
Dear Precious,

This is what your name means in Japanese.... Yes you are very precious and you should not let him treat you that way... technically the ring is his so you don't need any bad memory. Go on with your life and you deserve someone who will truely love you and want to spend the rest of his life with you and can't wait to wake up next to you everyday. A ring doesn't mean anything.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2004
Mon, 10-18-2004 - 9:35am
Legally if he breaks it off, you get to keep the ring. But if you break it off, you need to return the ring.

An engagement ring is considered a promise of marriage and so whoever breaks that promise is supposed to forfeit the ring.

But why would you want to keep it? I guess if you wanted to sell it or something? but it will probably cause some bad vibes from him if you keep it...

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-18-2004
Mon, 10-18-2004 - 10:51pm
There's logic, and there are laws, but what about how you will feel if he breaks the engagement? I find it interesting that you seem more concerned about the ring instead of you. You will probably be heartbroken and sad and will have to deal with the death of a dream. The ring will serve as a reminder. Do you want that?

A~

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-20-2004
Tue, 10-19-2004 - 7:29am
Interesting that's the only thing you are concerned about????

If he wants it back, just give it to him, why hold onto something that is never going to happen.

Also, it isn't necessarily cold feet, if more people listened to their intuition and didn't marry someone they weren't sure about there probably wouldn't be as much divorce as there is.

Why don't you wait to see if he asks for the ring back.