is he insane or am i losing my mind
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is he insane or am i losing my mind
| Thu, 03-04-2004 - 4:49am |
Okay,
So my boyfriend of a little over a year breaks up with me out of no where. This is the second time in one year. The first time we were argueing so it made sense. We broke up, got back together and worked things out. Things were great! He started talking about marriage and planning a future together. We got into disagreements here and there but nothing that couldn't be worked out and for sure not to break up over. He breaks up with me and we don't talk at all for about almost 4weeks. During this time however he tells everybody we both know how hard it is for him. His reasoning for breaking up was that he couldn't handle a relationship and doesn't think at this point in his life he needed to be in one. This coming from a guy who would talk about marriage and future for the last 7months of our relationship. He also added that his decision had nothing to do with his love for me in fact that he loved me too much. Whatever the hell that means.
He texts messages me on a week night at about 1am to thank me for giving his mom his clothes. I do not respond and he texts again with another message and then again an hour later-clearly wanting a response from me. I didn't. The next day he calls my friend to ask if I'm doing alright. She tells him I'm doing fine. I see some friends the same night that tell me he's misrable without me and say that he says he can't stand it anymore. Yet when talking to my friend earlier in the day says that he made the right decision and that I will thank him one day and knows how much I love him so we will be friends. I mean is this guy insane? Who the hell does something like this? He can't call me to ask me how I am, but can text me at 1 in the morning to thank me for his clothes. None of this makes any sense. It's like okay I'm trying to move on but how the hell do you move on from somebody who is so up and down. It's like is this guy crazy!? I don't know, sorry so long but any advice on the situation would be great!
So my boyfriend of a little over a year breaks up with me out of no where. This is the second time in one year. The first time we were argueing so it made sense. We broke up, got back together and worked things out. Things were great! He started talking about marriage and planning a future together. We got into disagreements here and there but nothing that couldn't be worked out and for sure not to break up over. He breaks up with me and we don't talk at all for about almost 4weeks. During this time however he tells everybody we both know how hard it is for him. His reasoning for breaking up was that he couldn't handle a relationship and doesn't think at this point in his life he needed to be in one. This coming from a guy who would talk about marriage and future for the last 7months of our relationship. He also added that his decision had nothing to do with his love for me in fact that he loved me too much. Whatever the hell that means.
He texts messages me on a week night at about 1am to thank me for giving his mom his clothes. I do not respond and he texts again with another message and then again an hour later-clearly wanting a response from me. I didn't. The next day he calls my friend to ask if I'm doing alright. She tells him I'm doing fine. I see some friends the same night that tell me he's misrable without me and say that he says he can't stand it anymore. Yet when talking to my friend earlier in the day says that he made the right decision and that I will thank him one day and knows how much I love him so we will be friends. I mean is this guy insane? Who the hell does something like this? He can't call me to ask me how I am, but can text me at 1 in the morning to thank me for his clothes. None of this makes any sense. It's like okay I'm trying to move on but how the hell do you move on from somebody who is so up and down. It's like is this guy crazy!? I don't know, sorry so long but any advice on the situation would be great!

And I don't think breaking up over a fight is understandable - just shows that you two can't work out disagreements - obviously there are exceptions but it sounds like you two thrive on the drama and the games - not healthy.
Just the same way you might want to stop seeing someone, but if they come out first and say they want to end it you start second guessing yourself, thinking what is wrong with me that he doesn't want me? Just plain insecurity.
Sounds like the breakup was probably the right thing, he just needs to move on. Which he will eventually do, especially if you keep ignoring him. Tell your friends that you don't want to hear what he says about you or your past relationship, and you don't want him contacting you (let them pass that message to him if they choose).