He just talks too much.
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| Tue, 12-07-2004 - 3:55pm |
Hi all,
I never thought I'd be writing something like this. It appears funny, but it has been bothering me so much, and I have come here as a last resort. He is a potential date, I can say. I feel good about what he is, and what he has to offer. But on the flip side, he talks so much, that it literally pains my ears and makes me wanna scream. There is absolutely no full-stop when he starts speaking. he is a very very knowledgeable guy, and he has so much to talk about any damn topic in the world, that he simply can't help himself. If I mention "ketchup", he will definitely not go without touching on the history of ketchup. i really, really, do respect him as a person, becoz I feel respected by him too. and maybe that's one reason I have never been able to even *hint* at him that he shd talk a little less. When I want to talk about something, he is a good listener, otherwise. After he finishes talking, or gets tired talking, he says "oh, looks like i hv been talking a lot, and making u feel bored?". And I have to bite my tongue and say "oh no u r fine. i learnt a lot!" instaed of saying "well, if u had given me a chance to put in a word, we'd have had an actual conversation".
I am sure if I mention, he will definitely take it seriously.
but I don't wanna hurt his feelings. And I fear I will hurt his feelings for sure.
I want to know this person better.
He is a good guy, and he has an interest in me.
How do I talk to him about this? Or should I just let him him be "himself"??
Thanks Guys.
Coz.

Bellina here! I truly think he's smitten,however a trifle bit of jitters in too much
chitchats.You can be subtle after he pauses,change subjects to something you may enjoy.Then smile and see if he'll be receptive to listen to a subject,e.g. like bellydancing(just to be humerous).This will entertain him,and perhaps he'll catch the drift that he's rambling on..See where this takes you and if there's still mutual attractions,splendid..Best wishes Bellina Faire
Wow. Are you from Philadelphia? Are we dating the same man? LOL
My dbf does the exact same thing. We literally had a 2-3 hour conversation one day about something to do with WW2. I am using the word conversation loosely! I didn't say much. I think in my case, he loves history...and I was a history major in college. Sometimes I think he is a little insecure and wants to prove that he is intelligent. He knows I won't date someone who doesn't have smarts (not necessarily book smarts but i love intelligent conversation). He got his GED and didn't go to college, but is smarter than alot of guys I went to college with.
Anyway, I hear ya about the situation. Usually, I just change the subject. Like..."OH! I just thought of this!" blah blah blah. He gets the point and I don't embarrass him by saying..."I am bored now."
There is usually a reason for it. Either he is a little insecure if there is an education difference...nervous if this is a brand new relationship, etc. Generally there is something behind it though. The thing to do is find out what it is.
Hope this helps!