He says I love him too much???

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
He says I love him too much???
2
Thu, 04-15-2004 - 8:30am
Can you really love someone too much?? Geesh, I wish someone would love me too much.

That would sure be nice for a change. So I wanted to see him once or twice a week. Is that too much? He said he loved me. He said he loved me more than he's ever loved anyone, and never wanted to talk to or see anyone the way he does me. Poor girls from his past. He does call most days, I will give him that. 2 or 3 little 10 minute phone calls. But that's it. Nothing too deep or he bolts. He says I was way too into him, that I loved him with everything I had, so that's bad? He says I do too much for him. Again bad? That is my nature. I am a giver and server by heart. When I love someone I want to do things for them. It makes me happy. I don't expect anything in return. I thought I was doing alright. Showing him how much I cared. Loving him. But it was too much. He is gone. Oh he wants to still be friends. But keeps making bedroom jokes, or so he says they are jokes. Like, we will be best friends who do it every now and then. I got pissed and told him to tell me like it is or don't ever call me again. He can't have it both ways. He got pissed and hollered all this out to me about how I love too much, give too much, Am just way too into him blah blah! What an idiot! I feel like a fool. Like a stupid, naive school girl. So you really have to play games and hold back. Can't you just be yourself. Or am I really just too much? I'd rather just be alone then deal with this kind of crap or have to play games to get or keep somebody. Who needs it anyway?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2003
Thu, 04-15-2004 - 9:02am
If you truly just love to do things for those who you love, and it's not an insecurity/clinginess/neediness type of thing, then I would say that you two were just a bad match and that you should find someone who appreciates the things you do.

Just out of curiosity, how long were you together? Too much, too soon is generally a bad thing.


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2003
Thu, 04-15-2004 - 11:51am
This experience should actually have taught you that you DON'T need to play games or hold back. Be yourself. And if someone doesn't think you're a right fit for him -- for *whatever* reason -- then logically speaking he cannot be a right fit for you. And that's something you should WANT to know and find out as soon as one of you feels that way. So....although it's natural to feel the way you do when you're rejected...that doesn't mean you did anything wrong. It just means you haven't yet found the man who's going to be a right fit with you. Keep looking and good luck.