is he shy or what?
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is he shy or what?
| Mon, 05-15-2006 - 3:47pm |
I met a guy in an online dating site. We emailed each other for over a month and I finally asked for his phone number. He explained that he was shy and not much of a talker at first. He was also sick and so I put off calling for awhile because he mentioned his throat being sore. Finally I called him and we had a great talk. I called him again a week later and once again it was great. We found out we had so much in common. At the end of this conversation I felt comfortable enough to give him my cell number. After that he called me and a few days later I called him again. After every conversation he emails me telling me how much he enjoyed talking. Since our last conversation it has been almost a week. He hasn't called me but he has emailed several times, sometimes just to say good morning. So, I don't feel like he's trying to blow me off because he emailes me first I only respond to his emails. He also has never asked about meeting. However I know he is interested and likes me. For instance he mentioned good changes happening in his life and when I asked him what changes, he told me getting to know me. He also has taken his profile off the dating site now. So, I'm just wondering if anyone has any ideas on what is up with him (is it just his shyness) and what should I do about it?

He might be enjoying his discussions with you online and even over the phone, but if he wanted to meet you he would have asked you out at this point, shyness or no shyness. It may not be you, it is just he prefers email because he could be:
1) emailing with 100 other women
2) married
3) in a relationship
4) not interested in a real relationship
5) not be the guy in the photo
6) the photo he is using is 15 years old
7) living in a different area than you
etc.
Tell him that you want to meet him and if he refuses move on.
Maybe he's shy, maybe he has poor social skills, maybe he has a gf or wife who found his profile and that's why he took it down and why he hasn't met you yet...who knows??? The only way you're going to know is if you meet in person and get to know him over a period of time.
If you are ok with having a pen and phone pal, then do nothing. But if like many of us, you're actually online to find someone to DATE, then I would let him know that you prefer to get to know someone in person rather than by email or over the phone, so he should call you when he's ready to meet you for a cup of coffee.
Sheri
Is it possible he has a girlfriend which is why he hasn't mentioned getting togehter? Or is really that painfully shy, an adult, that he can't make a date? Suggest getting together and gage his reaction. You want someone who can move from cyber to real sooner vs later. That's the only way to really get to know each other
Hey!
Just thought I'd let everyone know that I did mention getting together and we set it up for that week. He was waiting for me to mention it first so that I would be comfortable with meeting. So, we have gone out twice so far and things are going well!!! Thanks everyone for the advice!