Is he worth it, or should i move on?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-13-2002
Is he worth it, or should i move on?
2
Thu, 02-16-2006 - 11:08am

Hi,
i have been dating this guy for over a month now, he states that i am his girfriend, and i don't see anyone else. I really like him. We see each other once or twice a week. He started work now and his shift is different than mine, he works after 5 pm i work the regular 9 to 5, so basically now chances of us getting together have been reduced to just week-ends, but we still talk on the phone during the week. I'm starting to feel frustrated, because i noticed that the interest from him to me seems weaker. I'm always the one who initiates and asks to go see him, etc. On our phone conversation yesterday, we were talking about his work, if his hours were always going to be the same, ect, and he says something about that if he was to go work in another city he might have to move, and doesn't see a point to have a long distance relationship, i know i would also have a hard time not seeing him,etc. Than he also said that he can't promisse me anything...this statment left me very insecure about this relationship, basically his job controls wether we will have a relationship or not. I asked if he wanted to be with me, and he answered, "of course"...anyways, i feel very insecure about our relationship and i wonder if i'm just wasting my time, cause i could be with him today and gone tomorrow more less..i don't want that. Should i consider my options open and start dating other guys, or should stay with him, and wait and see where it goes? Please advise.

Thanks to all.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 02-16-2006 - 11:53am

luizinha...

PG thinks that if you're expecting "security in a relationship" after only one month of dating...FORGET IT! It ain't gonna happen!!!

Whether each of you can keep your relationship going in spite of the 'opposite work schedules' is a different issue! Some couples can pull this off...others can't!!

If you truly believe that YOU'RE DOING ALL THE WORK to keep the relationship solid, keep your distance for a little while. Go ahead and date other men (if you want to) since the gentleman you've been with has already told you: "HE CAN'T PROMISE YOU ANYTHING!"

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Fri, 02-17-2006 - 9:58am
You can certainly continue to see him in a casual way, it's only been a month, but heed for now that he has said he can't promise you anything. Yes keep your options open, you are free to date others as well, there is no commtiment here
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