he wrote 'reasons i dont love you'

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2004
he wrote 'reasons i dont love you'
3
Fri, 01-13-2006 - 6:20pm

yesterday afternoon a mutual guy friend of me and my boyfriends (workmate) came to our place for a quick visit because he had somewhere to go. we had people coming over for a bbq anyway, but this guy came over earlier than everyone else. he happened to pop over when my boyf wasnt home yet, as he was still at the pub for after work drinks.

anyway, boyfriend comes home and even tho it was he who invited this guy over for bbq, when he finds out he was around earlier when we were there by ourselves, he launches into jelous mode and starts spouting stuff like i 'planned it that way' and all this other stuff, now he's written a scathing letter heading 'reasons why i do not love you' and its two pages long, and sending me txt's i sent him from early on in the relationship that he's saved and saying 'i dont care anymore, and the letter and txt's will show who you really are'

*just so you know, i used to be good mates with this mutual friend, going out clubbing and hanging out with him, BEFOre getting together with my boyfriend. but this guy hurt my boyf once thats why he feels like this*

but OMG to be that upset he's not speaking to me and writing 'why i dont love you' about something so menial and rediculous, when i know he loves me SO much, isnt he overreacting?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Mon, 01-16-2006 - 11:01am

Sounds like he has major jealousy issues. If it's something you want to work through with him, I would ask him to go to counseling. Personally, that's behavior that I could not deal with but this is all up to you. I know many folks who would put up with it and work through it with the guy.


But yes, unless you've given him reasons to be upset, then I would say he's definitely over-reacting.


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Mon, 01-16-2006 - 12:34pm

Well, it definitely sounds like he's very upset and jealous, and perhaps irrationally so.

 Start

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2004
Mon, 01-16-2006 - 2:59pm

thankyou very much all for your messages.

we only spoke monday morning after a weekend of silence. we each gave our feelings and p.o.v and i expressed quite strongly i wont be hanging around if such an episode happens again and how i feel when he does this, and all about his jelousy to make him see it.

He see's it, and is very sorry and says he will try more and work on those things within himself because he doesnt want to wreck our relationship by doing this.

I have an aunty who is married to an uncle of my boyfriends nature (he's slightly worse) so i have something to model my guy against.

I am strong dont stand for behaviour i dont like from guys- I have walked away from relationships before that didnt fit my deal. so thanks and I will continue with this guy for now because he is awsome despite this one issue that he's willing to resolve.