Help!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2004
Help!
1
Tue, 09-28-2004 - 5:52pm
A few weeks ago I posted that I liked a guy from work. We'd been flirting around some and I finally spoke to him about it. I basically asked him if we could speak outside of work and he gave me a look like I was CRAZY and said no. I had asked him to keep it between ourselves as I didn't want the whole warehouse to know I'd approached him. At first things were akward, but they seemed to be getting better. We would say good morning to each other and deal on business only terms. I do not flirt with him, I talk to him like I talk to anyone else in the warehouse.

Now today, my boss spoke to me about harrassing this guy??? So I told the boss exactly what happened, what was said and how we've been acting since. I can't believe this guy! Does he sound a little mental or what?? Now I think I know why he's been married twice before. No offense to those out there that have been married that number of times. This was the very first time that I've ever approached a guy. I won't be doing it again. Am now considering looking for another job, even though I've been here longer than he has.

Does anyone have any pointers on how to deal with this until I get out of there?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
In reply to: koolaidkillersmom
Tue, 09-28-2004 - 8:34pm
well first off, you have to be so very careful when it comes to flirting/dating co-workers. I am currently going out with a guy who I also happen to work with (he pursued me rentlessly at work until I went out with him.)I was hesitant at first to go out with him because, as I was afraid, people started talking and spreading unnecessary gossip about us.

It sounds like this guy is giving you totally mixed messages. However, I do not think there is anything wrong with asking to speak to him outside of work. It isnt like you made some direct suggestions(right?)that may have been inappropriate in the work context. If you do not feel comfortable working with him any longer, then finding a new job may be your best option. I think it was totally out of line for this guy to say to your boss that you were "harrassing" him and that should not be your reason for changing jobs. If I were you, I'd just shrug it off and treat this guy like another co-worker and just be careful next time when it comes to approaching co-workers...Good luck!!!