HELP!!!! a guy with a rule

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2006
HELP!!!! a guy with a rule
13
Tue, 10-24-2006 - 11:33pm
So i met this guy back in ending of february.. We been on and off talking never really moved to dating.. So he has a rule.. before it becomes and offical relationship in his mind he needs to sleep with them...He knows I am a virgin and that Ineed some commitment before that happens.. So its been 9 months I have known him and still havent given it up and he is still around..He told me that he thinks we can make it work and he is willing to take it slow.. I am so confused I mean I like him a lot but I cant tell if he is only after me for sex.. How do I tell??? Anyone have any kind of advice and if he is only after sex do u think he would still be around after 9 mos....I have thought about sleeping with him but when the issue comes up I get way too nervous because I dont know what to do..and dont want him to not enjoy it..I am just afraid I will be bad at it and he wont like that...

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2006
Mon, 10-30-2006 - 3:32pm
Well I would like to just inform you all that I truly appreciate all the advice you have given me.. I made my mind up to go slow with him and take it from there.. I would also like to add in there that he asked me on an actual date tomorrow night.., we are going to go to Dinner.. I am happy for now but with guys there is no telling what could happen next...
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2006
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 8:39pm
If he can't respect you now he never will... What happens if he is in an accident and can't use his "part" and his relationship was based on sex? There needs to be compatibility outside of the bedroom.
R
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2006
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 9:42pm

This is the most ridiculous "rule" I've ever heard. How can you want to sleep with someone if you haven't been on a date or two with him?

Many years ago, when I was a teenager living in Mexico (and a virgin) a guy I knew tried a similar line with a lot of girls. He would start dating the girl and then accuse her of not being a virgin. (This was a big thing back then in Mexico. Probably still is, for all I know.) So when the girl said that she was indeed a virgin, the guy would ask her to "prove it" by letting him have sex with her. Some girls were stupid enough to "prove it." And, of course, he lost interest in them afterwards. He tried it with me, and of course I laughed at him.

Your friend is a bit more subtle, but not much.

Elsa

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