Help, should I still call him?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
Help, should I still call him?
4
Wed, 10-13-2004 - 11:44am
Me and my ex-boyfriend have been apart for about a month and a half coming out of a 2 year relationship, but I still call him every once in awhile and he talks to me. Just recently something happened to him, that effected me and made me mad, so I said something that I didn't mean. He immediately was angry and told me to stop f%#$ing calling him. Now I have called him to say sorry, left messages, and sent him flowers. So, I didn't call him for two days.On the third day I called him and he answered and we talked for thirty minutes. He will not admit if he still loves me or hate me, but he definitely said that we are not friends and that I shouldnt call him anymore. I don't get it because if you really didn't want me to call why answer the phone or talk to me for thirty minutes? I don't get it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2004
Wed, 10-13-2004 - 11:52am
I would leave him alone for good. If he wants to talk to you, he will call YOU.

The more you call, the more resentment he will feel towards you. You have said you are sorry by leaving messages and by sending flowers. Leave him alone now.

In your post you said that you 2 broke up " but I still call him every once in awhile"... does he every call you? If not, then you need to see that he was talking to you to be nice, but he wants to move on with his life. Not everyone who breaks up stays friends and keeps talking usually because they move on with their life, find a new boyfriend or girlfriend, etc.

The reason he talked to you for 30 minutes might be because he does not want to start a fight. He told you that he does not want to be friends and that you should not call. There's nothing else to know.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Wed, 10-13-2004 - 1:45pm
Me & my ex were together for four years and we haven't been together since June. I've received one written letter from him, that's the only contact we've had. We didn't break up on bad terms. But we don't call and chat with eachother - I've gone on with my life, and I'm assuming he's gone on with his.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2004
Wed, 10-13-2004 - 9:05pm
i'm sorry but girls like you make me mad

he doesnt answer your calls quite simply b/c he made it clear that HE DOESNT WANT TO TALK TO YOU. he asked you NOT to call him. he probably answered on the 3rd time/day whatever thinking that "ok maybe if i talk to her today that'll settle things and she wont bug me anymore"

you BROKE UP..that means NOT TOGETHER..i know it's hard getting over a long term relationship but it doesnt make it any easier by keeping contact w/ him and dwelling on him hoping y'all get back together. let it go. maybe he needs some time apart right now and your aggravating him and pushing him away even more. if he wants to talk to you he'll do whatever is in his power to make sure he gets a hold of you. move on

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2003
Wed, 10-13-2004 - 9:08pm
I'd listen carefully and respect his desicion: you're not friends and not to call him anymore. He might have been "polite" in taking your calls BUT now you're clearly out of his list of friends.