Help....Should I call or wait for him?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2004
Help....Should I call or wait for him?
4
Wed, 07-14-2004 - 6:54am
I have only a little problem and hopefully someone can help me out.....please....

I have been seeing this guy for about a month and we get along good. When I am not with him we talk on the phone, but lately when we talk he'll say I'll call you in a little while, and then ends up not calling. This is usually when he is with his friend's, does he just need his space with me not bothering him? This is somewhat an issue because he says he will call back but doesn't... he usually ends up calling the next day, but that is not the point. Should I call him back or wait for him to call? I don't want to sound too clingy. I know this sounds childish but it is something that really bothers me. Should I just get over it and not worry about him calling me or should I be upset? I don't understand men!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
Wed, 07-14-2004 - 10:42am
Have you ever brought this point up with him? If it's a big value to you, you should not let it go unnoticed. He may be busy, or his friends may be bugging him about seeing you so much. Relax. Bring it up at a time when you are together and both are in a good mood. This is not the kind of thing you want to bring up when you are angry, or upset. It is rude, in my opinion, not to call someone when you say you will, but some people don't see an issue with it. He may just be that way and doesn't know that it bothers you.

And you don't NEED to talk to him every five minutes...

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2003
Wed, 07-14-2004 - 11:49am
You should definitely wait for him to call. I've found that I have better luck with men when I let them do the chasing. Also, you end up getting a better idea of how they feel. If he doesn't call because he is out with his friends, it really is understandable...guys hate to look "p&$$y-whipped" in front of their buddies, especially early on in a dating relationship. If he is calling you the next day, then RELAX! He is definitely interested. From now on, however, if he says he is going to call you, don't sit by the phone, get out of the house and go do something you enjoy. If you aren't around when he calls, he'll leave a message. Plus, you'll be giving him the clear picture that YOU have a life and he is only PART of it. I hope this is making sense. If not, post again and I'll try to be a little more transparent.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-18-2004
Wed, 07-14-2004 - 12:30pm
Next time he says he will call you "in a little while," ask him to define that. Ask him if a little while means a few hours, the next day... what is it. You have a right to know.

Meanwhile, live your own life, and if you are around when he calls, great. If not, he can leave a message and wait for you to call him back... in a little while.

A~

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2003
Wed, 07-14-2004 - 4:55pm
I'm wondering if this is just a sort of thing that guys really don't think twice about. Sometimes I'll do that as well. In the middle fo something and then I'll say Call you back. and Don't. I usually figure not much else to say. So i dont call back. I think its this way with men too.

-S