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| Thu, 08-26-2004 - 3:32pm |
Me and my ex broke up about a month and a half ago. The reason for the breakup was that things were just getting boring between us. I was pretty upset at first but i got over it pretty quick. We were together about 7 months (im 19, hes 21)....now we are hanging out again... Friends with benefits type of thing. We see eachother a few times a week, and we talk everyday... We are only sleeping with eachother, not dating other people. He initiated the whole thing pretty much. He acts like i should care about things still that shouldnt matter now... like who he hangs out with etc. Problem is... im starting to worry. As of now, i dont have feelings for him beyond friendship, and of course sexual feelings. but im scared i could start to care about him the way i used to. And i really dont want that to happen, because it will obviously only complicate things. Im pretty sure this is just nothing to him...us hanging out or whatever... SO i was wondering have any of you ever done this with an EX, and howd it turn out? Is this a really bad idea or what??

The minute you agreed to accept the FWB routine...your definition and his definition of the term WASN'T the same! He wanted things the way they were...you were happier being more detached! Unless you 2 can "come together" and agree on how serious or non-serious your feelings are...one of you will probably get very upset with the other?
I guess "passion without purpose" is okay for some ivillagers...but Pianoguy is curious...do you REALLY enjoy each other's company after you both put your clothes back on?
Pianoguy
If it's not working for you, don't do it. If you are worried about getting too attached, you probably are already. Either tell him no more benefits we're just friends or end all contact. If you're not receiving what you need from a person, you shouldn't waste your energy on them.