how can we spend more time together

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2004
how can we spend more time together
2
Sun, 06-06-2004 - 1:58am
I'm new at this relationship thing. This is my first real getting serious kind of relationship.

I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for about eight months now. Everything seems to be going good. The first day we met, it only took him an hour to call me after I gave him my phone number and we've been talking over the phone atleast 5-10 times a day ever since. He's the first guy I've ever felt comfortable with. But, there are some things I'm concerned about. 1. He works ALOT, and I can accept that because I live a productive life as well, but it's not nearly as busy as his, so it's hard for us to go out on dates, We both put forth the effort to see one another. He always asks me to come to his job and see him which is not a problem but I'm starting to get tired of that, or he'll try to stop by and see me so we try to see each other atleast twice a week. One of the problems is, I wanna go out on dates and us do things together and he's aware because I've expressed these feelings to him, he says his busy work schedule is about to change very soon and he reminds me all the time that he didn't forget about how I felt. But it hasn't changed yet and I can't help but to become a little fustrated because I think he's so genuine and I want to spend quality time with him and it's difficult due to his busy schedule. I mean we talk ALL THE TIME every single day. I don't think he's cheating on me, I don't have those gut feelings. If anything I feel like this might be it, but we just got to get over this hurdle, the time issue. He's affectionate physically, but I like flowers and simple things like having little picnics and going to the movies things like that. I drop cookies and little gift bags for him at the front desk on his job, I enjoy doing things for him, but I want the same things. Is that being selfish? I'm becoming more reluctant to ask him to do things with me because usually the answer is "we'll see" and when the time comes around, he can't do it. He told me he how he felt about me, he said that he really cares about me, and I really care about him too. He's actually the first guy who ever made me feel good inside. I feel differently about him. He doesn't seem to put up a front. So my first question is how can we fix the time issue? Because I think I'm starting to fall in Love with him all though I haven't told him that yet. Oh! and not to mention he is my first which leads me to another problem, sex is alittle uncomfortable for me, because I'm not used to it. He told me to write down a list of all the things I want to try and I did, but we didn't get around to doing them yet because the penetration is uncomfortable. What can I do or what can he do to make sex more comfortable for me? And my third question is how long does it take for men to usually introduce they're girlfriends to they're family especially they're mothers? Because We haven't met eachother's family yet I'm not in a rush but I don't even know if his mother knows about me or not. I mean it's been eight months. I know he and his mother don't get along too well, he stays with her for the time being until he moves into his new place in a couple of months. So you know what that means, I've never been to his house, because of his mom I guess. So what's that about? Is that an insucurity on his part just because he lives at home? Please help me with some answers beacuse I think he's the one, but I need an experts opinion.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2004
Sun, 06-06-2004 - 8:29am

Wow...time, sex, parents...three seperate issues...so lets break it down:


Time-Sounds to me like you are making a lot of effort here which is great.

Lilypie Baby Days

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
Sun, 06-06-2004 - 10:55am
Hello jac!