How do I get rid of this man!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2006
How do I get rid of this man!!!!
4
Thu, 03-16-2006 - 8:50am

I have tried to get my (ex) boyfriend to leave, but he just wont! I told him I needed space (that didn’t work), I told him he needed to leave, I told him I didn’t love him like I used to, he even stole my mini-van after me telling him I didn’t want him to drive it.

I gave him a 30 day notice, but he still won’t leave. He even went so low as to ask his AA counselor, and my sister to help him win me back. I can't take this anymore.

PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 03-16-2006 - 10:05am

Change the locks on the day the 30 day notice is up...and if it's up already, do it today. If there's a safe, dry place to leave his stuff outside, do that, otherwise, set a time for him to come get it (and have a friend or two join you, preferably male, so he can't pull anything).

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Thu, 03-16-2006 - 12:17pm
He stole your mini-van and he's an alcoholic.
,
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2006
Thu, 03-16-2006 - 1:03pm
I'm not sure if he will become violent or not. He has in the past. Not with me, but with previous girlfriends.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2005
Fri, 04-07-2006 - 5:57pm
I'm not sure where you're at but the police here will help 'escort' someone from your property if you can't get them to leave on their own. After the 30 days is up he's got no rights to access the property anymore. If he does it's against the law and if he breaks it then the law can deal with him. Alcoholics need to see consequences of their actions to wake up - most never do until they lose everything, bottoming out. My on & off guy is an alcoholic too, he's in detox and counselling now. I hope that he makes it for his health and mind are faltering these days from years of abuse. Mine also refused to voluntarily leave the shared home completely. I had to get the cops involved to remove him and I have no regrets. I'm in counselling too to learn more about myself, heal from the years of living with him and to avoid making the same mistakes like trying to rescue someone(never works!) again.