how do i reassure him

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
how do i reassure him
2
Thu, 09-29-2005 - 2:47am
hi im seeing a man who is divorced like me we are both in our late 40s he wants to take one step at a time as he has been hurt which i can understand last time i saw him we had our first row and to me i feel as if its a step back i got into a sulk as he had withdrawn from me and made no attempt to give me a goodnight kiss he told me that a wall comes up and not to take it personally and if i want to give him a kiss or a hug to do it and he will give me one back how can i reassure him i wont hurt him
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Thu, 09-29-2005 - 10:06am
You can't guarantee anyone that they won't get "hurt". Being hurt has more to do with the hurtee than the hurter. You can either walk around on eggshells with this guy or discuss your feelings and needs openly. It's your choice.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Thu, 09-29-2005 - 1:50pm

How long have you been seeing him, first of all. Also, I think it's great that he told you, 'look, this is my communication pattern, i'm not saying it's good but i want you to know so that you don't take it personally.' he told you he wanted you to reach out.

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