How to keep the door open?
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| Mon, 11-08-2004 - 3:41pm |
My latest ex and I dated for 3 months after knowing eachother for 4 years. The third month of our relationship, he was occupied with his farming due to harvest, and I saw very little of him. He is also at a point in his life where he's graduated from college, yet not quite established in the real world. He's never held a real job, but he's helped other farmers.
We broke up a few nights ago because he feels he needs to go through this transition phase in his life alone. He feels he has some growing to do before he can be in a relationship. I agree with this.
I have decided to remain friends with him because we've known eachother for such a long time. I also feel that we're meant to be together. I understand that it's over right now, but I don't feel that it's permanent. He said it is possible that we may end up back together eventually.
My question is hard to explain. I guess I'm just wondering how do I keep him in my life and keep the door open? How often do I contact him? Next December (2005) I'll be done with college, and I'll need to decide whether to move away or stay around here. I'd be willing to stay around here if he and I are together. I was thinking maybe next June I'd ask him if he'd like to spend some more time together, to see if we could try our relationship again - if we are both single, that is. That way if things do work out, we could let them grow, and then I could decide which way to go with my life once winter arrived.
I feel that our relationship didn't get much of a chance. We only had 2 months to move from 3 years of friendship into something more, then the last month we saw eachother maybe five days because harvest is such a commitment to the farmers around here.
If anyone has any input or advice, it would be appreciated! Thank you in advance!

I'm actually very self-involved right now. I hadn't planned on dating anyone again until I graduated college. This all came as a surprise to me... he and I dating, that is. In no do I intend to plan my life around him. All I want to do is keep a friendship between us, and touch base with him before I leave the area.
I'm not expecting us to get back together, I just think down the road it may be worth another shot. Like you said, there are many great people out there... and I'm excited for all those whom I have yet to meet in life. :) The future holds things beyond my imagination. Thanks again for your input!
I posted this reply to another person's reply, as well...
Thanks for your response to my post.
I'm actually very self-involved right now. I hadn't planned on dating anyone again until I graduated college. This all came as a surprise to me... he and I dating, that is. In no do I intend to plan my life around him. All I want to do is keep a friendship between us, and touch base with him before I leave the area.
I'm not expecting us to get back together, I just think down the road it may be worth another shot. Like you said, there are many great people out there... and I'm excited for all those whom I have yet to meet in life. :) The future holds things beyond my imagination. Thanks again for your input!