How long should I wait?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2004
How long should I wait?
3
Wed, 08-25-2004 - 2:25pm
My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 4 years. We are both 31 years old. We met back in college over 10 years ago and have been friends ever since. We dated long distance for two years between NY and Fla. I moved to Orlando 2 years ago. He says that he wants to marry me. I mention an engagement once in a while. I don't want to be a nag, but how long do you think I should wait? I want to have children soon and get our family started. Am I being way to patient or should I be more patien?

Thanks

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
Wed, 08-25-2004 - 5:52pm
Why can't you just sit him down and discuss your feelings? Tell him honestly that you don't want to rush him, but you want to know what his life plan is. If he says he sees the two of you getting married, then you know. If he's really unsure, then you know that most likely it's not going to happen and you might want to move on.

What you don't want to do is wait forever and be wasting those years on someone who had no intentions of marraige.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2003
Wed, 08-25-2004 - 6:07pm
4 years is enough to date and know if you're meant to be married. It seems that you been "waiting" for quite a while. so if you're ready then say so. Honesty and communication are some of the pilars for a relationship. I wouldn't wait more, if he's ready he is if not then I'd go my separate way. It's a tough decision though. Good luck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2004
Thu, 08-26-2004 - 12:44am
I feel you've been waiting long enough. You should really sit him down and talk to him about how you feel. Tell him you want to get married, and soon. Tell him how you want kids and a family. If he doesnt want either of that, or just tells you to wait. Then you're going to have to take into serious consideration, finding someone new. You can't spend your whole life unhappy because you wanted to wait for this one guy. I wish you the best of luck!!