How often do you see each other

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2004
How often do you see each other
2
Mon, 08-16-2004 - 5:24pm
I have been dating this guy for a little over a month now. I am totally into him and he seems to be really into me to. The one thing is that he is such a "fly by the seat of your pants" kind of guy. We never make plans. He usually waits until the last minute to ask me to go and do something. It really bothers me, because I really like hanging out with this guy, but when your friends ask you to do something and then he calls... well you know what I mean it sucks.

My friends say that this could be my fault. I usually go right on over when he calls, they say I make myself too available. They say I should play hard to get. But I don't like to play games and I love hanging out with him. Maybe this is just the way he is and I can't change it, or is my availability in turn causing his reactions? Hmmmm....

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 08-16-2004 - 5:32pm
You shouldn't PLAY hard to get, you should BE hard to get! By that I mean, when he calls and you have plans, say, "gosh I'm sorry, but I didn't hear from you so I made other plans. Next time call me a day or two in advance, ok?" A couple times of this happening and he may well get the hint.

However, he may not...you may just be incompatible in this regard. If that's the case, it's up to you to decide if you can live with it.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
Mon, 08-16-2004 - 6:12pm
I'm gonna have to agree with Sheri. Don't be ditching your friends to hang out with a guy. You friends are going to become really upset with you, if they already aren't, that you ditch them all the time. If you've made plans and he calls, you say to him, "sorry, I made plans, but maybe we can do something on ____" or like Sheri said, "next time call in advance". If he's upset, too bad. You shouldn't have started by ditching your friends to be at his beck and call, so change that unless that's how you want to continue.

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