How to touch his heart?
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| Thu, 02-02-2006 - 11:41pm |
Question For
Men: What makes you go crazy over a woman?
Women: How do you make a man go crazy over you?
I've been seeing this guy for more than a month, and seems to me I like him more than he likes me. He says he likes being with me, is comfortable with me and enjoys talking to me, finds me attractive. But he didn't say he 'likes' me. I don't think he sees me as his gf yet, even though we are doing stuffs that couples do - kissing and cuddling, semi-naked, no sex yet.
Sometimes I feel like ending things as I can't see us developing into anything serious - he will be leaving the country soon, to work elsewhere. I can't see us progressing more deeply through a long distance relationship, as he's not into emailing. BUT, I do like him, alot, and hope we can continue to make things work even though we'd be living apart.
Some people believe that men like women who are hard to get. I was pretty 'easy' in the sense we started fast - kissing on the 2nd date. He didn't really have to pursue me.
I hope I don't sound childish by asking this, but any ideas what are the chances of him liking me more if I say we should call our 'fling' off? (I don't think 'relationship' is the right word as we're not serious yet). Would he start appreciating me only when he thinks he's going to lose me? Some couples grow stronger after breaking up and getting back together.... Or should I continue to play cool as though I'm not bothered, and hopefully, gradually touch his heart? Should I tell him I really like him?
If he really accepts my calling for an 'end', I'd be very hurt, but I'd rather go through that sooner than dragging on and have a silent and unofficial breakup when he gradually stops contacting me in the future.
He has asked me before what do I want from him. I could not answer him. Deep down, I want a serious relationship, but I could feel he wasn't ready for that, maybe because he'll be leaving for another country, or maybe because he's just not that into me.. Perhaps I should just keep quiet about how I feel and go with his flow?
Edited 2/2/2006 11:47 pm ET by lindsayt05

Most guys (I find) like girls that are hard to get. Ever wonder why a guy you're not crazy about won't stop calling? Because you're doing everything you can not to encourage him. I'm not suggesting you play games. But when a girl initiates every date, calls everyday, some guys get turned off.
You're moving soon, so I think the guy doesn't want to get too involved. He is not at all into the long distance thing, so he's probably already ended the relationship in his mind. He's enjoying your company until you go.
I didn't realize he was moving! What i've found through my similoar ordeal is, as sad as it is, guys seem to really like a challenge. I peronsally don't know how to say no to the one you really care about, but in my experience, that's the only way mine responds to me. They subconciously seem to like a chase, a girl whose not always available. My question is, how long is he leaving for? if it's for a short time, he might just want to leave room for a possible fling while abroad..if it's for a long time, well, when in rome? i'm sure you can contend how you can hate and love a man all at one moment. You hear him say "i care for you," and the fairy tale image starts clashing with reality. All I can say is goodluck; let you're heart lead you; deep down you already know the answer.
:)
You can't MAKE a guy like you more. Either he does or he doesn't. And if a guy really is into you, even coming on a little strong won't chase him away. If he really likes you, he'll want to try to be with you no matter what.
IMO, I think he doesn't want to get too involved with someone since he is leaving soon. Chances are, it's not specifically YOU but that he doesn't want to get too involved with anyone. But also, I think that if you can't tell him what you want because you're afraid of chasing him off, then he's not the one for you anyway. If the fact that you're looking for a relationship and he's not will run him off, then you're not meant to be anyway. If he really likes you, even if he's not ready right now, he'll be willing to stick it out and see where it's going if you're not at the same place at the same time.
Good luck but I don't think that he's the guy for you if you're too scared to tell him your feelings.