I caught him cheating-help me understand

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2004
I caught him cheating-help me understand
3
Mon, 11-08-2004 - 11:53pm
I dated this guy for 6 months. We were exclusive and he even introduced me to his parents' friends as his girlfriend. Then, 2 months after that, he went on a 2 week trip, and when he came back he told me he didn't miss me and that he didn't think we had chemistry. So we broke up. One month later, I called him after I had a bad date and he sounded really happy to hear from me. Soon after that, he started to call me and ask me out, etc. We got back to dating. Then I saw him with another woman at an event so I stopped calling him altogether (he lied to me- he said he was going out with friends). He kept calling me and pursuing me.

Then one night I asked him if he was dating anyone, he said no and that he only wanted to date one person at a time. Since that was not clear enough to me, I asked him if we were exclusive. He said yes and since that conversation, I saw him only once in 1 week even though he would call me almost everyday. Then, one evening I came back from dinner with another friend and decided to pay him a surprise visit since I saw his car was back. It turned out, he had candlelights on (I could see it from his balcony)and he refused to open his door for me claiming he had company and could not talk to me at that time. Well, what kind of company could he possibly have that he could not open the door to his own girlfriend??

I am angry, hurt, humiliated. He has not tried to call me. Help me understand what happened. Was I just too naive to realize he was a player?? Or was there something more?

Edited 11/9/2004 1:14 am ET ET by akita93

Edited 11/9/2004 1:51 am ET ET by akita93

Edited 11/9/2004 1:52 am ET ET by akita93


Edited 11/9/2004 1:53 am ET ET by akita93

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
Thu, 11-11-2004 - 5:07pm
Hello akita, welcome to the board!

 
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Thu, 11-11-2004 - 6:50pm

This man sounds like he has never given you the consideration or devotion you want.

 Start

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2004
Tue, 11-23-2004 - 11:53pm
I find it hard to believe that you took a guy back that said he didn't miss you when he went on vacation and didn't think you had chemistry. I also don't understand why you called him a month after breaking up just because you had a bad date. What you were telling him was that you were willing to be his doormat. A man doesn't respect a doormat. And yes it's obvious he was with another woman with the candlelight and all. Six months is a long time, so I don't think it was too soon for you to think you were exclusive. Obviously he didn't think so and on top of that he lied to you. Please don't take this loser back. He TOLD you he didn't care in so many words, you just didn't want to hear it or believe it.