i don't know what to do

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
i don't know what to do
2
Wed, 07-21-2004 - 9:28am
i fell in love a year ago and started casually seeing a boy who admitted to confusion over his feelings having been in love with his best friend of 8 years for a long time. when she found out about us she decided she loved him and i let him go as i knew we would not work out with such unresolved feelings. she broke it off after a few months during which time she was travelling and he and i became closer and closer and were intimate again. after their break up we continued seeing each other a bit more openly but then she returned and told him she wanted him back. he said he did not want to but admits to still having left over feelings for her. he has always thought that if he and i are to have a chance he needs time to get over what happened and start fresh going out with each other properly at some point with no more lies or confusion. i understand this but feel i have already waited for him for a year and feel very resentful. i also feel we should keep seeing each other because she is currently working and living a few hours away and will be back in two months. recently we have become so close and i can see him falling more in love with me and losing some confusion and we have been very happy. but he recently had a one night stand with this girl again. he has said it will never happen again and that it helped him realise it was not what he wanted but when he saw how unhappy i was he started saying again that maybe he needed more time because he hates hurting me. i feel so resentful of this and i love him and want to be together. i don't know what to do. should i break up with him for good? or try and stay together? i feel that waiting around while he sorts out his head after so much patience already will break an already very damaged self respect. please help me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
Wed, 07-21-2004 - 5:33pm
Hello notatoughcookie!

 
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Thu, 07-22-2004 - 5:33am
thank you. i know you're right. i think if i'm honest i just get too scared that if we have time apart he won't choose me but i do realise this has to stop. and i know that i definitely need some time out. thanks.