I felt so uninteresting to him.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2004
I felt so uninteresting to him.....
2
Sun, 08-01-2004 - 12:31pm
This may be a silly question, but I would like to know your oppinion because this stayed hanging on my mind.

Yesterday, I went to meet a guy I talked online for 2 weeks. We met in a coffee shop near the sea. I wasn't in my best days, because of some personal issues that happened that day, so, I wasn't beeing the easygoing and funny person I normally are. After about half an hour, he suggest for us to go to another place near to eat an icecream. And we leave the coffee shop and go walking. Then, we started talking about music, and favourite bands, and he said he loves Bjork, he enjoys very much her music, style, personality, and then he says: "I would love to spend 3 hours in a coffee shop talking with her, listening to her"...

Well, I felt K.O. that moment.... that's what we've been doing during the past half hour, and he sugested for us to leave and go eat an icecream... I felt so an uninteresting person that moment... I know he was not comparing me and her (that's absurd), but wasn't that an innapropriate and insensible comment to do, since we were doing the same and he asks to leave the coffee shop?

At the end of the date, he asks if next time we could meet and play tennis (I was a competitive tennis player in the past, and he's starting playing). I know if he didn't liked me, he would not suggest this, but does he want to meet me again to know me better or only to take advantage of my tennis skills, since while playing there will not be much talking? Am I beeing paranoid?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2003
Mon, 08-02-2004 - 7:36pm
Did you set up a 2nd date? Day, time?.....If not, don't read too much into this -- He may never call you again. But if he does, don't read too much into that "Bjork comment". How many times we say things without realizing how the other person might hear it?...
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2004
Tue, 08-03-2004 - 12:25am
I would say that if he asked you out for a 2nd date you shouldn't take what he said too personally. Yes it was insensitive, but you said that you weren't yourself that day due to some personal issues. Maybe he was picking up on that and felt you weren't having a good time, so he wanted to try something different.

Give him another date or two, if you are still getting those bad vibes, then you can just avoid making future plans with him. But you might find that he was feeling insecure because you seemed distracted that day, and he was just running at the mouth.

Good luck.