I hate phone conversations!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-13-2003
I hate phone conversations!
3
Thu, 03-04-2004 - 11:32pm
This is kind of a weird question, but how can I make a phone conversation more meaningful? For example, this guy and I are trying to "get to know each other" because we are hoping to eventually have a relationship one day. The problem is, we live 5 hours apart and can't see each other that often. And honestly, I hate phone conversations. I always have, because I feel like it's not really communicating. And emailing is even worse. Is there anyway I can somehow get over this so that we can pursue something?!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Fri, 03-05-2004 - 12:35am
Well, I guess the best way is to plan out in advance what you want to say, and then keep the conversation short. Since you're just getting to know each other, it actually should be pretty easy. You start off with the usual niceties.. "How was your day?" Then plan to ask one or two questions per phone call to learn about his life and background. "What's your family like?" "Where'd you go to school?" Of course, if he's interested in you, he'll ask you back a couple of questions, you'll answer them, and there you have a phone conversation! Then, get off the phone before the conversation starts to slow down.

The best thing, of course, is to see one another in person as much as possible. One way to encourage him to make a date would be to let him know that you're not really a telephone person. Hopefully, he'll jump on the opportunity to ask to come and see you.

Good luck.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 03-05-2004 - 6:45am
I don't think you can get to know each other as far as compatibility for a romantic relationship by typing and talking - you need consistent, in person time together. I think one of the best ways to get to know someone is to spend an afternoon speaking very little to each other and either walking or sitting in a park, reading separate books while sitting on the couch together - etc. - bonding through silence and just being together is equally or more important - talk on the phone - you can hide your body language, you don't need to deal with his, and you can pretend to be deep by using big important words when you're not saying much of anything meaningful - as opposed to when you've been quiet for an hour, reading, look up at each other, and smile - that can tell you more about the person than 5 hours on the phone, IMHO.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Fri, 03-05-2004 - 11:59am
I am also not a phone talker and hate long phone conversations so I understand where you're coming from. However, I don't really understand LDRs (especially when you're trying to *start* something from the beginning that way). From my own experiences I have come to believe that the only true way to get to know someone for the real person they are is to have lots of face to face contact with them. I do not believe you can truly get to know a person via phone, email or IM. It is just not real life, or the same thing as a real life relationship.