I Have A Question

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2007
I Have A Question
5
Mon, 07-09-2007 - 1:40pm
I've been fooling around with this guy for a few months now (making out, phone sex, etc.) and I've been thinking of what it would be like to sleep with him, but I'm afraid of the condom breaking if I actually do something with him. Is it safe to use two condoms? Some of my friends told me it's okay, some people told me it's not. I just need some clarification on that. Thank you to anyone that can help me out.
Avatar for blondie0506
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-09-2007 - 4:02pm

NO, it is NOT safe. The friction between the 2 pieces of latex can PROMOTE breakage.

Talk to your doctor about emergency contraception, such as Plan B.

Also consider being in a relationship before having sex with this guy. You sound young, and if the condom breaking is freaking you out, is it safe to assume this would be your first time?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2007
Mon, 07-09-2007 - 4:15pm
Yes, this is my first time. I'm just very confused and trying to sort things out. A lot has happened very quickly with him and I. I can't get to a doctor because my insurance is terminated until some paperwork is processed. I also don't know if my insurance, when it gets activated again, will cover it.
Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Mon, 07-09-2007 - 4:46pm

Hi rock,

In response to your first question, condoms are not 100% safe--but neither is any birth control, even the pill. If you are concerned about AIDS or STDs, then of course, condoms would be the only thing that would protect against that, that is, if there is no breakage. And then there is a female condom available, but I don't know if it has any better track record than male condoms. And then there is the "morning after" pill...I think that's available in all states...but I'm not sure if that requires a prescription.

As to your insurance: if you really can't afford a doctor right now and can't wait, there are birth control clinics out there you could go to. You'd pay on a sliding scale.

I don't know how old you are, but since this is your first time, I'd really wait until you did not feel confused. I'm no prude, and I see nothing wrong with having sex at a (somewhat) young age, as long as you are really ready for it. Naturally there's going to be some anxiety surrounding your first time, that's only natural.

Under no circumstances should you be talked into having sex, and absolutely say NO if he wants to have sex without a condom. It's just not worth it, really. And maybe you already know this, but there should be NO penetration at all without protection: you can get just as pregnant from the initial stages of sex. You could also be sexual together without actual penetration. This can be a good way to work up to it. But I'm not trying to encourage you to do anything you aren't ready for!!

Please take care. --FG

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2007
Mon, 07-09-2007 - 4:55pm
I have told him many times that I am not ready to have sex right now and when we are making out, I tell him when I feel uncomfortable and he stops whatever he's doing, which, I would hope, is a good thing. And, yes, I am 20 years old, that's pretty young, I guess.
Avatar for floridagirl52
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Mon, 07-09-2007 - 8:34pm

Hi Rock,

I don't think 20 is terribly young. However, if you're not ready, you just aren't, no matter what your age. I'm glad he stops when you tell him to. My hope for you is that your first experience be a good one, and one that you want.

Take care. --FG